Why do referees always hurry to catch their next flight? Because it's "two
minutes 'fore boarding!"
Many basketball players fail their tests in school because they do not want to pass.
What does a basketball player say when he misses?
Shoot!
Why did the skier from Helsinki dominate the downhill slalom competition?
He led the race from start to Finnish.
What’s the easiest shot in golf?
Your fourth putt.
This event is sure to be out of bounds.
Do you know how to dunk cookies? Ask a basketball chef.
In the history of bowling, there is one bowler who floats like a butterfly and stings pretty much like a bee. His name is Muhammad Alley.
What is the difference between a ball hog and time?
Time passes.
The team’s star basketball player decided to remain at home the entire weekend. He didn’t want to be called out for travelling.
How do crazy runners go through the forest?
They take the psychopath!
Why don't orphans play baseball? They don't know where home is
Give me some pigskin
Ski Area Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, know what I have in common with this new powder? 8 inches.
Why did the volleyball player not want to travel? Because he had been there and dug that.
Prepare to be bowled over.
Which legend lived in a shack? Was it Eddy? No, Ma-hovel-ich!
An orange and an apple signed up for a tournament. No one was surprised to find out they were both seeded.
What should you do when you play volleyball against a team of satanists? You beat the hell out of them.
Which author is anxious to write the book: Colorado Rockies, World Series Champs?
Ben Whayten.
What do apres-ski participants in white-out blizzard conditions eat for lunch?
Icebergers. BRR!
All punts are highly intended
Why shouldn't you hire a volleyball player to be your bartender?
The service may be excellent, but he'll try to spike all the drinks.
The refs kept calling interference, even though goalmouth incidents were in
de-crease.
Here’s more proof that I’ve gone off the deep end.
What do you call a Spanish football player with no legs?
Gracias.
Why did the vampire strike out?
He used the wrong bat.
What do you get if you cross a tree and a baseball player? Babe Root.
Finally, the soccer ball decided to quit the team. The reason behind its move was that it was tied of being kicked around.
When the going gets tough, let the pins fall where they may.
Why are fisherman so stingy?
Their jobs make them sel-fish!
Why can’t I ever win a game returning serve? Give me a break.
What did one hillbilly say to another? I got a new fly rod and reel for my wife. Best trade I ever made.
What is the worst advice a coach could ever give to a nude volleyball team? Play hard.
What do the guys at the ski repair shop eat their lunch on?
Baseplates.
I want to practice my forehand outside, but it will be wet in the morning and nice later on. So here’s the plan for today: inside-out.
Why did the blonde skier only wear one boot?
Channel 7's weatherman said there was a 50% chance of snow.
I’ve never lost a game of football basketball or volleyball!
Though I’ve never played a game either.
Which superstar has a nose for the puck? Mario the Magsniffascent.
Why wasn’t the little pumpkin allowed to swim?
There was no life gourd on duty!
I feel tail great!
I had a really good fantasy football team.
Then, My Luck ran out.
[Pool Noodle] That’s using your noodle!
"What are your thoughts on diving?"
"Well, I guess it's descent as a hobby."
The beauty with bowling is that you can get three strikes, but you still remain in the game.
Why can't basketball players go on vacation?
They aren't allowed to travel.
A certain Leafs right-winger was sued by the Louisiana government. He was
Owen N'awlins.
When your putt lips out, what disease do you have?
Liprocy.
Wife: I’m sick and tired of your obsession with golf!
Husband: Why, is it driving a wedge between us?
What's the sweetest moment in a hockey game? When they're icing the puck.