What do you call it when a football player suffers a career-ending injury in his last game before retirement? Gridirony!
My moment in the sun.
For instant fun, just add water.
What’s the difference between a punter and punster?
A punster gets his kicks with bad puns like these!
You shouldn't wear glasses when playing football...
They say it's a contact sport.
Tennis is a lot like waiting tables. The most important thing to get right is the first serve.
I can’t believe I framed the ball in for a winner. Shank you!
Why did the blonde run backward?
She wanted to gain weight.
This pool is impressive. Or should I say swim-pressive?
Why did the quarterback suddenly walk off the field?
The coach told him to take a hike!
Where can you find the biggest diamond in the world?
On a baseball field.
Why did the volleyball players line up from shortest to tallest? The coach wanted the team to switch from a 5-1 line up to a 6-2.
Which athlete wrote the book, Jumping for Exercize?
Lee Ping.
What is a defensive football players favorite dessert?
Apple Turnover.
The beauty with bowling is that you can get three strikes, but you still remain in the game.
What do apres-ski participants in white-out blizzard conditions eat for lunch?
Icebergers. BRR!
Why do you need six players to carry the volleyball to the game? No one can carry the volleyball and a whole team.
Why can you never use a serve receive pattern against a sniper? They’d all start running for cover.
What did one hillbilly say to another? I got a new fly rod and reel for my wife. Best trade I ever made.
What swims in the sea, carries a machine gun, and makes you an offer you can't refuse? The Codfather
Birds too love cheering on their soccer teams. They egg them on.
I used to make extra money by selling illegal tennis equipment on the side, but I was approached by some thugs who told me to stop.
I guess they control the Tennis Racket around here.
The dog didn’t want to play soccer because it was a boxer.
What do volleyball players like in bed? Kinky sets.
What type of football player is the biggest drug addict?
The lineman.
My wife drove our German car off the pier into the sea. The next day I went diving to look for it.
I got the Benz.
In a conversation between one pin and another, one said, “Let us never split.”
The Montreal baseball team relocated to Tampa after being purchased by the
Exposito bros.
How are baseball umpires and angry chickens alike?
Both make fowl calls.
If somebody says "You pitch great for a southpaw," is that a left-handed compliment?
A baseball walks into a bar. The bartender throws him out.
This event is sure to be out of bounds.
What do a great hitter and a boxer have in common?
Both are serious sluggers.
What do you call a free treadmill?
The Great Outdoors.
A man named Martin Draw was campaigning for the Senate. He printed up shirts saying “I’m with Draw” to support his campaign. The next day, he wore the shirt to a tennis tournament. When he walked up to the tournament desk, the director handed him his money back and asked him why he couldn’t play.
Where do football players go shopping in the offseason? The tackle shop.
What is the fastest fish in the water? A motopike
There is a specific type of cats who love to go bowling. They are known as alley cats.
All punts are highly intended
Where do players hide their marijuana?
Between the stash marks.
Why is learning to ski in France so difficult?
'Cause sometimes they won't Alp you.
My favorite sport is bowling cause I always strike out with girls.
How did the serve know when the bad serve was not with the hand? The server knew it was the foot fault.
How can you tell a vampire likes baseball? Every night he turns into a bat.
Why did the volleyball players like to practice in the library? Their coach said that they’d be doing some reading today.
Why can't you tell a joke while ice fishing? Because it'll crack you up!.
We’re calling your number.
Poor white splash.
Which HOF defenceman was nicknamed The Gravedigger? Denis Plotvin.
Why do volleyball players join the military? They want to gain extra experience in the service.