What do you call a woman standing in the middle of a tennis court?
Anette.
What did the bad soccer announcer get for Christmas?
COOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Staying humble thanks to that fumble
What is the worst advice a coach could ever give to a nude volleyball team? Play hard.
Why do hitters find it so hard to be productive when they are indoors? They always work on an angle to play outside.
How do you tell which is the Groom at a Polish wedding?
He's the one with the CLEAN bowling shirt
Today I donated my old basketball hoop to a school for the blind.
It will be missed.
What do you get if you cross a ski instructor and a vampire?
Frostbite.
The reason why soccer players are brilliant in math is because they know how to use their heads well.
A guy walks into the bar.
It's hardly surprising he didn't make the steeplechase team, on reflection.
What happens if the Grim Reaper spikes the ball? You have to dig your own grave.
My moment in the sun.
How do volleyball players deliver their messages? Through Air Mail.
Seven days without playing soccer can make one weak.
What did the player on the Bumblebee basketball team say after making a foul shot?
Hive Scored!
The toilets at an AMF are known as the boweling alleys.
Soviet goaltenders got their hair cut at Vladislav's Tress-shack.
What type of trunks do foresters wear to the swimming pool?
Tree trunks!
Why was the baseball player so good at writing advertising jingles?
Because they're so catchy.
The favorite soccer position for ghosts is the ghoul keeper.
Ed Belfour's new contract offer isn't high compared to other goal tenders.
If there's a Tim Horton's chain, should there be a Lanny McDonald's? Or Doug
Harvey's? And what about Ron's Francise?
Which is the coolest football team in Italy?
AC Milan.
Did you hear about the Owl that could play American football?
It was a superb_owl.
I went to my girlfriend's soccer match for the first time last weekend. She kept grabbing the ball with her hands.
She's a keeper.
Why did the volleyball player get sent to jail? Because he was set up.
If you happen to knock down all the pins, don’t be overly excited. Spare us the details.
Do you know the easiest way to stop squirrels from playing soccer in your garden is to hide the ball? Well, it drives them nuts.
My football teammate asked me, “On a scale of 1-10, how do you rate our after-victory celebration?”
I gave him a high five.
What is the 7th pin in bowling called? Mother-In-Law!
Golf balls are like eggs…
They’re white, they are sold by the dozen, and a week later you have to buy more.
[Beer] This is my number one draft pick.
Why can’t a car play football?
Because it only has one boot.
The only way athletes can stay cool even in a charged game is by standing near the fans.
They say that you can spike a volleyball. But you can never take away its dig-nity.
Jack has a large neck so he decided to wear a bowtie to his wedding. Otherwise, he’d end up with a tiebreak.
Why did the volleyball player have ropes and shoe strings? They wanted to tie the score.
Why can you never use a serve receive pattern against a sniper? They’d all start running for cover.
Did you hear about the battery and the volleyball who got into a fight? The volleyball is waiting to go to church and the battery was charged.
Is it ad-out again? I’m going to hit my breaking point.
What stat do the Miami Dolphins lead every single year?
All Porpoise Yardage!
Which violation do ghosts get called for the most in basketball?
Ghoul tending.
I surprised the judges at my last diving competition by performing a cannonball.
I made a huge splash.
By the seat of one’s punt
After the Moroccan scored a Hat-trick, the players gathered for the fez-off.
Why are pilots so bad at basketball?
Because they're always traveling.
You can forget about winning, princess. Because even Cinderella can’t get to this ball.
The soccer player brought string to her game because she wanted to tie the score.
How did the serve know when the bad serve was not with the hand? The server knew it was the foot fault.
Why did the golfer need new socks?
Because there was a hole in one.