Why should somebody who's just out of rehab think twice before going on a skiing holiday?
Because it's a slippery slope.
Why are fisherman so stingy?
Their jobs make them sel-fish!
What did the player on the Bumblebee basketball team say after making a foul shot?
Hive Scored!
What might folks in Tokyo find between Godzilla's toes?
Slow runners.
Which author is anxious to write the book: Colorado Rockies, World Series Champs?
Ben Whayten.
Why should you swim in an ool instead of a pool?
Because there’s no “p” in it!
What do you call a small fish magician? A magic carpet
What’s the difference between a punter and punster?
A punster gets his kicks with bad puns like these!
Basketball players at times get athletes foot. Come to think of it, it is like the missle toe astronauts get.
Jack has a large neck so he decided to wear a bowtie to his wedding. Otherwise, he’d end up with a tiebreak.
Golfer: I’d move heaven and earth to break 100 on this course.
Caddie: Try heaven. You’ve already moved most of the earth.
What should you do when you play volleyball against a team of satanists? You beat the hell out of them.
Why did the hotdogger quit skiing at MaryJane?
Because it was the wurst stunt skier at Winter Park Resort.
What game do some skiers like to play on the road trip to the slopes?
Ice Spy With My Little Ice.
Good bowlers always keep their minds out of the gutter.
What does Darth Vader say when he plays volleyball? May the spike be with you.
Why can't basketball players go on vacation?
They aren't allowed to travel.
Staying humble thanks to that fumble
In Quebec they used to practise throwing the puck in the zone, and then
sitting back to wait for a turnover. But eventually the players were
criticized for this dump-and-chaise tactic.
The coddled superstar sat in the seats with the fans instead of on the bench
with the team; for this, ironically enough, he was accused of grandstanding!
Fred is so condescending about my tennis strokes. I can’t take any more of his backhanded compliments.
When the going gets tough, let the pins fall where they may.
Our game is as tight as our spandex. This would be an awesome team motto.
Why don't baseball players join unions?
They don't like to be called out on strike.
We had an argument on our way back from the tournament. Our position is that their goal was stopping ours.
I’m icing the kicker – and by kicker, I mean beer.
Which is the coolest football team in Italy?
AC Milan.
Wife: I’m sick and tired of your obsession with golf!
Husband: Why, is it driving a wedge between us?
What happens if you read too many Painful baseball Puns?
You're left in stitches.
I hate scuba diving.
It was the lowest moment of my life.
What does the ski bum do when the chairlift line is too long?
He's gondola top of the mountain.
What is the difference between Barry Zito and bowling icon Walter Ray Williams, Jr.?
Walter Ray Williams, Jr. knows how to throw a strike.
Why is it annoying to eat next to basketball players?
They dribble all the time.
Setters do it better. This sounds like a good motto to put on a T-shirt.
The bowling team of which I am captain is known lightning. This is because we get countless strikes.
Which hulking left-winger could body-slam The Giant? Dave Andre-chuck.
In later years was the Great One in decline? Yes he was on the Wayne.
Why did the volleyball player not want to travel? Because he had been there and dug that.
The only ship that has never docked on their harbor is the premiership.
There is one commonality between a magician and a soccer player. They both do hat tricks.
Ideally, the cost of a bowling game should be ten pinnies. However, with inflation, the price always goes up.
A team may be talented, but there is no substitute to this, no train no gain!
The density of this concrete leads me to believe one thing: it is a hard court.
The team’s star basketball player decided to remain at home the entire weekend. He didn’t want to be called out for travelling.
Why do volleyball players join the military? They want to gain extra experience in the service.
What is the fastest fish in the water? A motopike
Why shouldn't you hire a volleyball player to be your bartender?
The service may be excellent, but he'll try to spike all the drinks.
You cannot get a basketball game fairly officiated in the jungle because cheetahs are all over.
Why can’t a car play football?
Because it only has one boot.
Prepare to be bowled over.