Why are street thugs so good at basketball?
Because they know how to shoot, steal, and run.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Eyesore.
Eyesore who?
Eyesore from my long run—can we take the elevator?
What do a rabid rabbit and a basketball player have in common?
Mad hops.
Why can you never use a serve receive pattern against a sniper? They’d all start running for cover.
I’m establishing my punning game early today.
Jack has a large neck so he decided to wear a bowtie to his wedding. Otherwise, he’d end up with a tiebreak.
How can you tell a vampire likes baseball? Every night he turns into a bat.
Where do sperm play football?
In a con-dome.
The huddle is real
Why are spiders such great volleyball players? Because they have an amazing topspin.
Which superstar has a nose for the puck? Mario the Magsniffascent.
If there's a Tim Horton's chain, should there be a Lanny McDonald's? Or Doug
Harvey's? And what about Ron's Francise?
Are you still wondering why the basketball player could listen to his music? Don’t you know he broke a record!
Setters do it better. This sounds like a good motto to put on a T-shirt.
Having a ball this weekend with my best friends
I’ve been getting blitzed all game
I used to have a scuba diving business
But it went under.
What should you do when you play volleyball against a team of satanists? You beat the hell out of them.
I had a girlfriend that went scuba diving...
One day I lobster and never flounder again.
What do you call a basketball team that cries after they lose the game?
A bawl club.
Why did the baseball team recruit a tiny ghost?
Because they needed a little team spirit.
Why don't baseball players join unions?
They don't like to be called out on strike.
I hate scuba diving.
It was the lowest moment of my life.
Soviet goaltenders got their hair cut at Vladislav's Tress-shack.
I have a lot of respect for fans of football teams that consist of only ghosts
They have a lot of spirit.
What do skiers get if they sit in the snow for too long?
Polaroids!
Join us for plenty of play action.
During holidays, soccer referees send their families yellow cards.
I really hate these strings. I can feel it in my gut.
Where does a fisherman go to get his hair cut?
The fisherman goes to a bobber shop!
What do volleyball players do when they go to church? Serve God.
Basketball players make good husbands. They never shoot their wives.
How many middle-hitters do you need to screw in a light bulb? Only one, but the the setter has to put it perfectly in their hand first.
It feels great to hit the ball again. It spin a long time.
What does a basketball player say when he misses?
Shoot!
What did his wife give the guy when he came home all sweaty from his run?
The stink eye.
Where's the weak spot on a Scottish goalie? The fief hole.
What do baseball players eat at White Castle?
Sliders.
I like my matches like my tennis balls: Pressureless.
Even if injuries end it prematurely, Paul's had a good Kariya.
What is the favorite sport for the young bass? It is the bass get ball.
Did you hear about the football team that drafted a vending machine?
They really needed a quarter back!
"What are your thoughts on diving?"
"Well, I guess it's descent as a hobby."
What happens if the Grim Reaper spikes the ball? You have to dig your own grave.
What's the difference between a sorority girl and a bowling ball?
You can only fit 3 fingers in a bowling ball.
Which HOF defenceman was nicknamed The Gravedigger? Denis Plotvin.
We’re calling your number.
Why can't basketball players go on vacation?
They aren't allowed to travel.
How do you tell which is the Groom at a Polish wedding?
He's the one with the CLEAN bowling shirt
The only time a basketball team can chase a baseball team is five after nine.