Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Eyesore.
Eyesore who?
Eyesore from my long run—can we take the elevator?
Don’t get me wrong, I love our soccer team. However, in sharp contrast to the albatross, our team doesn’t have two decent wings.
What must the Oregon football team do before each play?
Get all of their ducks in a row.
How many golfers does it take to change a lightbulb?
FORE!
[Drink] That’s a thirst down!
You should call us butter because we are on a roll. This would be one of the best volleyball puns to put on a T-shirt.
How do you call football without shoes?
Socker.
The huddle is real
The best place on earth to shop for soccer kits is New Jersey.
Which front-office type is the most promiscuous? The general ménageur.
Why was McGruff the Crime Dog ejected from the football game?
He was called for unnecessary gruffness!
What did his wife give the guy when he came home all sweaty from his run?
The stink eye.
I’ve been getting blitzed all game.
Why should you never go back in time to alter the outcome of a football game?
You’ll be called for past interference!
Golf is what you play…
When you’re too out of shape to play softball.
Do you always play this badly at the net? Because I don’t like your approach.
What can you serve and never eat? A volleyball!
The anti-vax basketball team lost every game this season
Apparently they never take any shots.
Why did the football coach attempt to destroy the vending machine?
Cuz it wouldn't give him his quarterback.
I’ve been getting blitzed all game
The success in this sport is not how you bowl, but how you roll.
A baseball walks into a bar. The bartender throws him out.
What happens if you read too many Painful baseball Puns?
You're left in stitches.
"What are your thoughts on diving?"
"Well, I guess it's descent as a hobby."
hat do you call it when a runner from Moscow starts a race at Red Square that ends in Finland?
Russian to the Finnish.
I’m not a bad putter…
I just can’t catch a break.
The basic rule in the bowling game is to ensure you leave no pin standing.
I like big punts and I cannot lie
. What do you call it when you heard the same jogger pun earlier, yet laughed again?
A running joke.
If volleyball were easy, they would call it football.
We’re calling your number.
What do sprinters eat before a race?
Nothing, they fast.
Went on a diving trip with strangers and found a sunken vessel. We're all pitching in to salvage and rebuild it.
I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friend-ship.
Why did the horny duck circle the baseball field?
She hoped to catch some fowl balls.
When the baseball team chose an owl masot, did they get a designated hooter?
Why do gnomes like baseball? Gnome Runs.
There is a specific type of cats who love to go bowling. They are known as alley cats.
What type of films should players watch to improve their shot? Slap stick.
The basketball player sat on the sideline and began sketching pictures of chickens. He was learning how to draw fowls.
I wish they’d change the scoring system, but tennis is set in its ways and doesn’t see the point.
What does the ski bum do when the chairlift line is too long?
He's gondola top of the mountain.
What do you call a married couple who compete in the marathon side-by-side?
Running mates.
Ski Area Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, I bet this chair lift weighs enough to break the ice.
What's the difference between a sorority girl and a bowling ball?
You can only fit 3 fingers in a bowling ball.
Did you hear the terrible rumor about the volleyball player? That’s what she set!
Why did the skier from Helsinki dominate the downhill slalom competition?
He led the race from start to Finnish.
Why do you need six players to carry the volleyball to the game? No one can carry the volleyball and a whole team.
If you golf on election day…
Be sure to cast an absent-tee ballot.
Why did the pirate captain want to hire a baseball player?
He knew he had a chest protector.
In a conversation between one pin and another, one said, “Let us never split.”