In later years was the Great One in decline? Yes he was on the Wayne.
Everyone is getting so paranoid, and diving into conspiracy theories lately...
Must be something in the water.
The success in this sport is not how you bowl, but how you roll.
Went to a game with my dad today and as we were standing up to sing, the veteran in him kicked in and he began tearing up. I said to him, "You know, technically, national anthems are just…
…country music."
Seven days without playing soccer can make one weak.
Did Cyclops the X-man play hockey? Yes, he enjoyed lasing up the skates.
The beauty with bowling is that you can get three strikes, but you still remain in the game.
Poor white splash.
I went to Oxford University, where I was a philosophy major and the starting goalkeeper on the football team.
They called me Soccertes.
There is one commonality between a magician and a soccer player. They both do hat tricks.
If somebody says "You pitch great for a southpaw," is that a left-handed compliment?
The bowling solder decided to launch a pre-emptive strike.
My life-long rival just beat my record for deep-sea diving.
This is a new low.
What stat do the Miami Dolphins lead every single year?
All Porpoise Yardage!
I have a lot of respect for fans of football teams that consist of only ghosts
They have a lot of spirit.
Where do fish sleep? In a river bed
Where do ghosts play volleyball at? At the volleyball corpse.
What type of noodles do swimmers like best?
Pool noodles!
Which rangy centre could cover the whole ice? Jean Umbrelliveau.
Basketball players make good husbands. They never shoot their wives.
What should you wear when you play against the National Volleyball Team? Football helmets.
[Water Slide] I was going to get some work done, but I decided to let it slide.
The basic rule in the bowling game is to ensure you leave no pin standing.
Cold Ski Pun of the Day: I'm tired of slalom skiing. Alpine over another telemark now.
Chairlift Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, is it really windy up here, or are you just blowing me away?
There are many grounds religious children can practice their soccer skills. However, most of them love the prayground.
I could go on and on about Salming but I don't want to Borje.
A hippie when his opponent disputes his calls: That’s pretty far-out, man!
Why don't matches play baseball?
Because one strike, and they're out.
Why do you need six players to carry the volleyball to the game? No one can carry the volleyball and a whole team.
I had a girlfriend that went scuba diving...
One day I lobster and never flounder again.
Soviet goaltenders got their hair cut at Vladislav's Tress-shack.
If an Octopus were to play football, how many tackles per game would an Octopus have?
Tentacles
What is the difference between a fish and a piano? You can't tuna fish.
What is a volleyball player’s favorite drink? Sets on the Beach.
Do you believe this? All soccer players, irrespective of their country of origin, have one goal.
What do the guys at the ski repair shop eat their lunch on?
Baseplates.
What is the worst advice a coach could ever give to a nude volleyball team? Play hard.
What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
Juan on Juan.
It is not really much about how you bowl, but instead how you roll.
Baseball point to ponder: Why do we sing "Take Me Out To The Ball Game" at the ballpark, if we're already there?
How did the blind guy from Denver enjoy a bit of apres skiing on Lookout Mountain during the last white-out?
He brought along his skiing-eye dog.
I want to play my match outdoors so I can hit the ball higher in the air. I’m not good at persuading people, so I’m going to hire a lob-byist.
I’m icing the kicker – and by kicker, I mean beer.
Why can’t I ever win a game returning serve? Give me a break.
We like rough sets. As long as you practice safe sets, there isn’t a problem.
Footballers love one specific type of tea; penal-tea.
Who's got a penchant for spearing? Pronger!
Which superstar has a nose for the puck? Mario the Magsniffascent.
How are ladies' baseball teams and cupcakes alike?
Both are delicious and depend on a good batter.
Why was McGruff the Crime Dog ejected from the football game?
He was called for unnecessary gruffness!