What is the 7th pin in bowling called? Mother-In-Law!
Which HOF defenceman was nicknamed The Gravedigger? Denis Plotvin.
Which Star Wars movie is a baseball player's least favorite?
The Umpire Strikes Back.
What do skiers order at fast food restaurants?
Icebergers with Chilly Sauce, on the slide.
Why did the barber win the race?
He took a short cut!
Why don’t quarterbacks share puns at the line of scrimmage?
Because they produce audible groans!
Beauty is only pig skin deep
Why did the skier from Helsinki dominate the downhill slalom competition?
He led the race from start to Finnish.
The basketball player sat on the sideline and began sketching pictures of chickens. He was learning how to draw fowls.
Why are Scandinavians the fastest runners in the world?
Because they start out near the Finnish line.
They say I’m too indecisive to be a tennis umpire
but I still haven’t ruled it out.
Which LA King was the total package? Parcel Dionne.
We’ll have a ball.
Why are football players not allowed in bowling alleys?
After getting a strike, they spike the ball.
Why shouldn't you hire a volleyball player to be your bartender?
The service may be excellent, but he'll try to spike all the drinks.
What do sprinters eat before a race?
Nothing, they fast.
Why did the volleyball player get sent to jail? Because he was set up.
Do you want to know what you get when you cross a newborn snake with a basketball? Really! Ooh you will end up with a bouncing baby boa.
What do you call a boat full of polite football players?
A good sportsman ship
How do ski instructors get to work?
By icicle.
Baseball point to ponder: Why do we sing "Take Me Out To The Ball Game" at the ballpark, if we're already there?
If you do bowling and for some reason you can’t hear a pin drop, something could be wrong with your bowling.
Which commandment do baseball players hate the most? Thou shall not steal.
When your putt lips out, what disease do you have?
Liprocy.
If fish lived on land, in which country would they live? Finland.
I am disappointed that you are taking such a closed-stance on my footwork advice.
There is a commonality between a thanksgiving and a bowler guest. They both love turkey.
Ski Area Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, I bet this chair lift weighs enough to break the ice.
The closer we came to the alley, the louder the bowling thunder.
Why was McGruff the Crime Dog ejected from the football game?
He was called for unnecessary gruffness!
Ski Area Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, do you believe in love at first sight, or should I go around this chairlift again?
Why are spiders such great volleyball players? Because they have an amazing topspin.
Though it sounds mean, a bad soccer team is much like an old bra. It has no cups and minimal support.
The favorite soccer position for ghosts is the ghoul keeper.
[Chips] This is what I call a chip shot.
Why did the volleyball players like to practice in the library? Their coach said that they’d be doing some reading today.
Longfellow is the known poet of basketball.
Do you always play this badly at the net? Because I don’t like your approach.
Which Finn is like a hotdog on the ice? Teemu Salami.
hat do you call it when a runner from Moscow starts a race at Red Square that ends in Finland?
Russian to the Finnish.
What type of noodles do swimmers like best?
Pool noodles!
Did you know that old bowlers do not die? They simply end up in gutters.
I feel tail great!
Where do Danish players aim with the puck? Top kroner.
If volleyball were easy, they would call it football.
For instant fun, just add water.
What did the swimming pool say to the skimmer?
Leaf me alone!
Every player knows pretty well that they cannot afford to go through life without goals.
Football is one habit I will never kick
This event is sure to be out of bounds.