Why did the hotdogger quit skiing at MaryJane?
Because it was the wurst stunt skier at Winter Park Resort.
Did you hear about the volleyball players who are getting married? They say it was love at first spike.
Why don't quarterbacks share puns at the line of scrimmage? Because they produce audible groans!
I’ve never lost a game of football basketball or volleyball!
Though I’ve never played a game either.
Do baseball players ever wear armor?
Only during knight games.
Why do blind people hate diving?
It scares the hell out of their dogs.
Today I donated my old basketball hoop to a school for the blind.
It will be missed.
We all sat by the fireplace listening to the basketballer’s story. At some point, I found it unbelievable. It was such a tall tale!
What do you call a giant that's good at football?
Goaliath.
What do baseball players eat their backyard BBQ on?
Home plates.
What game do some skiers like to play on the road trip to the slopes?
Ice Spy With My Little Ice.
Deep sea diving is so dangerous.
I just can’t fathom it.
How many Winter Park ski instructors does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. One to screw it in, and two to say, "Nice Turns, Nice Turns!"
Did I tell you about my new girlfriend who also plays football?
Yeah.. she‘s a keeper
Are you still wondering why the basketball player could listen to his music? Don’t you know he broke a record!
Why do volleyball players join the military? They want to gain extra experience in the service.
What do Walter Payton and Luke Skywalker have in common?
They both did great with a hand off!
Where can you find a golfer on a Saturday night?
Clubbing.
Will the Red Wings be able to replace their venerable captain Steve? No, because
when it comes to hockey smarts there is no Yzer man.
But would they be stoned by the goalie?
No, they'd smoke it right between the pipes!
What did the football player say to the flight attendant?
"Put me in coach."
Two racquets started dating. Unfortunately, one was stringing the other along without any intention of tying the knot.
Did you hear about the Heisman Trophy candidate who falsified his rushing stats?
The yards were stacked in his favor!
Why did the baseball batter go crazy?
Because the pitcher only threw scewballs.
Beauty is only pig skin deep
Here’s more proof that I’ve gone off the deep end.
Seven days without playing soccer can make one weak.
[Chicken] We’re serving this during the game, so you might call it a live ball fowl.
A tennis ball walks into a bar.
The bar man asks: “have you been served?”
What does the pope eat during lent? Holy mackerel!
[Chips] This is what I call a chip shot.
What did the marathoner do after he won the race?
He decided to go into politics and run for office.
I feel tail great!
What do you call a boat full of polite football players?
A good sportsman ship
Why are volleyball players always so blameless? They always pass the blame and try to avoid faults.
Why do benched players always seem to look so wise? They don’t have to look like fools on the floor and entertain the crowds.
Set or be set. This is certainly the right way to look at things.
The reason why bowling alleys are so quiet is such that you can hear a pin drop.
Too bad my serve hit the tape. Well, at least they’ll LET me hit it again.
I know an untidy guy who’s excellent at playing soccer.
What a Messi guy.
What it is it called if you refuse to go running today?
Resistance Training!
You should call us butter because we are on a roll. This would be one of the best volleyball puns to put on a T-shirt.
Which hulking left-winger could body-slam The Giant? Dave Andre-chuck.
Do you always play this badly at the net? Because I don’t like your approach.
I got so mad at my partner hitting moonballs, I had to pusher off the court.
After the Moroccan scored a Hat-trick, the players gathered for the fez-off.
It is ridiculous having a basketball team that lacks a website. Do you mean none of them can string three W’s together?
I went deep sea diving and a mollusk wanted to give me a hug!
Damn cuddlefish.
Why did the kid pursue scuba diving?
Because all his grades are below C-level.
If Messier retires he's sure to be moosed.