A spectator at a baseball game wondered why the ball kept getting bigger and bigger. Then, it hit him.
Why is Cinderella bad at football?
Because she’s always running away from the ball.
What has 18 legs, spits a lot, and catches flies?
A baseball team.
Did you know Karl Marx's sister invented the starting pistol?
Her name was Onya Marx.
Why do you need six players to carry the volleyball to the game? No one can carry the volleyball and a whole team.
Where do players hide their marijuana?
Between the stash marks.
My friend was telling me about how a shark attacked her while she was diving
I told her, that bites.
Why was the basketball court so slippery?
Because all the players were dribbling on it.
I’ve been getting blitzed all game
I could go on and on about Salming but I don't want to Borje.
When is the course too wet to play golf?
When your golf cart capsizes.
Is the pool safe for diving?
It deep ends.
What do runners eat before a big race?
Fast food.
Why should you never go back in time to alter the outcome of a football game?
You’ll be called for past interference!
This event is sure to be out of bounds.
How are baseball umpires and angry chickens alike?
Both make fowl calls.
Basketball players at times get athletes foot. Come to think of it, it is like the missle toe astronauts get.
[Chicken] We’re serving this during the game, so you might call it a live ball fowl.
Why did the volleyball player cross the street? There were players on the other side.
Why should you you stand on the service line? So that you can order ice cream.
What do you call a very slow skier?
A slope-poke.
I'm currently dating a famous soccer player. He's so loving and caring towards me.
He's a keeper.
The basic rule in the bowling game is to ensure you leave no pin standing.
The bowling solder decided to launch a pre-emptive strike.
Why do golfers hate cake?
Because they might get a slice.
How many Winter Park ski instructors does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. One to screw it in, and two to say, "Nice Turns, Nice Turns!"
I made a snap decision to watch football today
If volleyball were easy, they would call it football.
What do you call a boat full of polite football players?
A good sportsman ship.
[Pool Noodle] That’s using your noodle!
What’s the difference between a punter and punster?
A punster gets his kicks with bad puns like these!
The last time I wanted to go bowling, all the pins were on strike. So I just stayed at home and watched TV instead.
Why did the skier from Helsinki dominate the downhill slalom competition?
He led the race from start to Finnish.
What do you call a free treadmill?
The Great Outdoors.
Where do ghosts play golf?
On a golf corpse.
Opposing coaches facing the Leafs in the 60s and 70s knew that Dave was the
one to Keon.
Before they go out to a basketball game, all cheerleaders down several bottles of root beer.
What do you get if you cross a tree and a baseball player? Babe Root.
Where did the Flopper work in the offseason? At Dominik's Hat-Check.
What trophy do you get if you never score any points? The Art Rouse.
Did you hear about the Heisman Trophy candidate who falsified his rushing stats?
The yards were stacked in his favor!
What did the foot say to the football?
I toed you.
My favorite sport is bowling cause I always strike out with girls.
The reason why bowling alleys are so quiet is such that you can hear a pin drop.
If you want a loyal marriage, get hitched to a basketball player. He will never pass you, rather he will keep you all to himself.
Football is one habit I will never kick
Everyone is getting so paranoid, and diving into conspiracy theories lately...
Must be something in the water.
What did the mitt say to the baseball?
Hey baby, you're quite a catch.
The ref keeps shafting us the offsides; I think he's blue lyin'.
Don’t drop the ball – without you, the party will be incomplete.