A hippie when his opponent disputes his calls: That’s pretty far-out, man!
What did the marathoner do after he won the race?
He decided to go into politics and run for office.
Why did the other volleyball team bow? Because they heard that the queens of the court were there.
If there's a Tim Horton's chain, should there be a Lanny McDonald's? Or Doug
Harvey's? And what about Ron's Francise?
The toilets at an AMF are known as the boweling alleys.
Which legend lived in a shack? Was it Eddy? No, Ma-hovel-ich!
How do volleyball players deliver their messages? Through Air Mail.
I used to make extra money by selling illegal tennis equipment on the side, but I was approached by some thugs who told me to stop.
I guess they control the Tennis Racket around here.
Why did the blonde run backward?
She wanted to gain weight.
What type of pool do mechanics like best?
The car pool!
Will the Red Wings be able to replace their venerable captain Steve? No, because
when it comes to hockey smarts there is no Yzer man.
Do you believe this? All soccer players, irrespective of their country of origin, have one goal.
What is a cyclops' favorite winter activity?
Sking. That's like skiing, but only with one eye.
What do volleyball players do when they go to church? Serve God.
Football is one habit I will never kick
All punts are highly intended
What should you wear when you play against the National Volleyball Team? Football helmets.
What's the best advice to give to a young baseball player?
If you don't suceed at first, try second base.
What does a basketball player say when he misses?
Shoot!
What do a great hitter and a boxer have in common?
Both are serious sluggers.
Birds too love cheering on their soccer teams. They egg them on.
Our game is as tight as our spandex. This would be an awesome team motto.
I used to hate tennis, but ever since I’ve started winning 6-0, I love it now.
Why did the baseball team recruit a tiny ghost?
Because they needed a little team spirit.
What do you get for diving into a wave of oranges.
Vitamin Sea.
What did the mathematician do at the baseball game?
Square root for the home team.
How do crazy runners go through the forest?
They take the psychopath!
Scuba diving is a good hobby... if you wanna hit rock bottom.
Why wasn’t the little pumpkin allowed to swim?
There was no life gourd on duty!
Where do Danish players aim with the puck? Top kroner.
Why are pilots so bad at basketball?
Because they're always traveling.
Why did the quarterback suddenly walk off the field?
The coach told him to take a hike!
What is the fastest fish in the water? A motopike
My friend was telling me about how a shark attacked her while she was diving
I told her, that bites.
I hate when I have to stop scuba diving
If makes me deep-pressed
Why don't orphans make good baseball players?
Because they don't know where home is.
What do you call a horse that is good at football?
Neighhhhh-mar.
Ski Area Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, want me to jump off this chairlift for you? 'Cause I think I could fall for you.
Why are street thugs so good at basketball?
Because they know how to shoot, steal, and run.
Why did the volleyball player cross the street? There were players on the other side.
I surprised the judges at my last diving competition by performing a cannonball.
I made a huge splash.
Baseball point to ponder: Why do we sing "Take Me Out To The Ball Game" at the ballpark, if we're already there?
Grasshoppers do not fancy soccer matches because most of them prefer cricket matches.
I almost brought a screwdriver to the football game, but was stopped by security
They said that match-fixing isn't allowed.
We’ll kickoff the party with some cocktails.
What do apres-ski participants in white-out blizzard conditions eat for lunch?
Icebergers. BRR!
What do we call the basketball team that won the donuts championships? – dunkin donuts.
My favorite sport is bowling cause I always strike out with girls.
Where do football players go shopping in the offseason? The tackle shop.
What did the bowling pins do?
They went on strike.