Why is Cinderella bad at football?
Because she’s always running away from the ball.
Why should you never go back in time to alter the outcome of a football game?
You’ll be called for past interference!
Why did the football referee have trouble measuring the first down?
Someone was yanking his chain!
Do you know why an octopus is so good at Football?
It gets ten tackles a play.
By the seat of one’s punt
[Donuts] We’re going the hole nine yards for this game.
The goal nine yards
Staying humble thanks to that fumble
I’m establishing my punning game early today.
Why couldn't the skeleton play football?
He didn't have the guts.
Here’s the game plan: [party details]
With salsa, cheese dip, and guac, our bowl game is hot.
We’ll have a ball.
If an Octopus were to play football, how many tackles per game would an Octopus have?
Tentacles
Did you hear about the football team that drafted a vending machine?
They really needed a quarter back!
You shouldn't wear glasses when playing football...
They say it's a contact sport.
We’ll kickoff the party with some cocktails.
How do you call football without shoes?
Socker.
[Drink] That’s a thirst down!
I have a lot of respect for fans of football teams that consist of only ghosts
They have a lot of spirit.
The calm before the score
I had a really good fantasy football team.
Then, My Luck ran out.
o my friend Justin was late for the football game.
But that’s okay because he arrived Justin time for kickoff.
Don’t drop the ball – without you, the party will be incomplete.
Which is the coolest football team in Italy?
AC Milan.
The football won’t be the only thing spiked at this party.
[Food Spread] This is the line of scrumptiousness.
Why can’t a car play football?
Because it only has one boot.
This event is sure to be out of bounds.
A goal new ball game I he a kick outta you
Football is one habit I will never kick
Why don’t quarterbacks share puns at the line of scrimmage?
Because they produce audible groans!
What type of football player is the biggest drug addict?
The lineman.
The huddle is real
What did the football player say to his Chinese son
Go Long!
What do you call a Spanish football player with no legs?
Gracias.
I like your tight end
Did you hear about the fumbled exorcism? The guy retained possession!
[Bundled Up Guy] This is what you call man coverage.
Join us for plenty of play action.
Don’t pass on this party – rush on over.
My girlfriend told me she's breaking up with me because of my football obsession.
I told her she'll need to wait till the summer window if she wants a free transfer.
Did you hear about the Heisman Trophy candidate who falsified his rushing stats?
The yards were stacked in his favor!
Why was the potato fired from his job at the football stadium?
He was a horrible commentater.
What do you call it when a football player suffers a career-ending injury in his last game before retirement? Gridirony!
What do Walter Payton and Luke Skywalker have in common?
They both did great with a hand off!