“I figured out why Uncle Sam wears such a tall hat. It comes in handy when he passes it around.”
— Soupy Sales
“Some taxpayers close their eyes, some stop their ears, some shut their mouths, but all pay through the nose.”
— Evan Esar
"The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has."
- Will Rogers
“The best way to teach your kids about taxes is by eating 30% of their ice cream”
– Bill Murray
“When there’s a single thief, it’s robbery. When there are a thousand thieves, it’s taxation.”
– Vanya Cohen
"If you don’t drink, smoke, or drive a car, you’re a tax evader."
– Thomas S Foley
"The difference between tax avoidance and tax evasion is the thickness of a prison wall."
– Denis Healey
"Instead of taking the pants off the taxpayer it might be better to take the vest off the vested interests."
— Mark Twain
"I am proud to be paying taxes in the United States. The only thing is I could be just as proud for half of the money."
- Arthur Godfrey
“People that cheat on their taxes truly disgust me. This is not the world I want to raise my 27 dependents in.”
"Most entrepreneurs would rather have root canal surgery without anesthesia than go through the nightmare that is tax return preparation."
— Nina Kaufman
"Congress can raise taxes because it can persuade a sizable fraction of the populace that somebody else will pay."
- Milton Friedman
"The art of taxation consists in so plucking the goose as to obtain the largest amount of feathers with the least amount of hissing."
- Jean-Baptiste Colbert
"We contend that for a nation to try to tax itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle."
- Winston Churchill
“How many God-fearing, tax-paying, law-abiding men in Las Vegas does it take to light a bonfire? Both of them.”