Tired

There was a Young Lady of Clare,
Who was sadly pursued by a bear;
When she found she was tired,
She abruptly expired,
That unfortunate Lady of Clare.
Why are bunnies always tired in April? Because they just finished a March.
A boy goes to confession.

Boy: "What are you doing father?"
Priest: “Its called masturbation and soon you'll be doing it."
Boy: "Why do you say that father?"
Priest "Because my hand is getting tired.”
Why are koala's so sleepy? Because you just got to be tired being so darn cute all day!
Too tired, I’m out of aspara-gas.
Revenge of the Blonde
Revenge of the Blonde A blonde woman was sick and tired of all the unfair jokes about blondes. One evening, she went home and memorized all the state capitals. Back in the office the next day, some guy started telling a dumb blonde joke. She interrupted him with a shrill announcement, "I've had it up to here with these blonde jokes. I want you to know that this blonde went home last night and did something probably none of you could do. I memorized all of the state capitals." One of the guys, of course, said, "I don't believe you. What is the capital of Texas?" "T!" she answered.
Why did the cheese shop owner finally quit the business?
He was tired of the daily rind.
Why did Mrs. Wine Grape run away from home?
She was tired of raisin a family.
“Sometimes I’m so tired, I look down at what I’m wearing, and if it’s comfortable enough to sleep in, I don’t even make it into my pajamas. I’m looking down, and I’m like T-shirt and stretchy pants? Yup, that’s pajama-y. Good night.”
Rebecca Romijn
The day I made that statement, about the inventing the internet, I was tired because I'd been up all night inventing the Camcorder.
Al Gore
Why did the bat look for a job?
She was tired of hanging around.
Why couldn’t the skeleton get out of bed?
He was bone tired.
What happens if you run in front of a car?
You get tired.
Old astronomers got so tired of waiting for the sun to go down, that they decided to pack it up and call it a day.
Cold Ski Pun of the Day: I'm tired of slalom skiing. Alpine over another telemark now.

Chairlift Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, is it really windy up here, or are you just blowing me away?
Wife: I’m sick and tired of your obsession with golf!
Husband: Why, is it driving a wedge between us?