Stars Jokes

Sherlock Holmes Goes Camping Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson decided to go on a camping trip. After dinner, they laid down for the night, and went to sleep. Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his best friend. "Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see." Watson replied, "I see millions of stars." "What does that tell you?" Watson pondered for a minute. "Well, astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets." Also, looking at the stars, I think that the time is approximately a quarter past three in the morning." "Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful and that we are small and insignificant." "Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow." "What does it tell YOU, Holmes?" Holmes was silent for a minute, then spoke: "Watson, you idiot... Someone stole our tent!"
Did you hear about the crook who was stealing guitars from classic rock stars?
He was just arrested for Petty theft.
What do pizza delivery guys and porn stars both see too much of?
Stiff tips.
How do planets staying busy during hunting season?
By shooting stars.
My feelings of love for you are like the stars in the sky. They're probably long dead.
Where do most koala movie stars live? In Koalawood, Koalafornia, of course!
I’ve never seen stars as beautiful as your eyes.
You can count on the stars, but you can’t ever count on how much I miss you.
What TV show did the astronaut appear in?
Dancing with the stars.
Flamingos are great to go out with, because they all party like flock stars.
What is the name of the Hollywood movie that stars an "outlaw" brain and an "outlaw" woman on a road trip?
Thalamus and Louise.
What all kinds of stars wear the sunglasses? The movie stars.
One night I looked up at the stars and thought, ‘Wow, how beautiful.’ But now that I’m looking at you, nothing else can compare.
Last night in bed, I was gazing up at the stars and thinking to myself....
Where the heck is my roof ?
Do you know what it's called when you see the sun, the moon and the stars all at the same time?
Really good acid.
An inspirational speaker came to speak at the fruit stand today. He told us to peach for the stars.
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