A blonde was cruising down the highway at breakneck speed when a cop pulled her over. “May I see your license and registration, please?” asked the cop. Miffed, the blonde said, “I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you took away my license and today you want me to show it to you!”
How does a man show he's planning for the future? He buys an extra case of beer. What do you call the useless piece of skin on a penis? The man. Why did God give men penises? So they'd have at least one way to shut a woman up.
How does a man show he's planning for the future? He buys two cases of beer instead of one.
What should you give a man who has everything? A woman to show him how to work it.