Service Jokes

What's a pirate's least favorite letter?
Dear sir,

Your internet access has been terminated due to illegal usage.

Sincerely, your service provider.
“The taxpayer—that’s someone who works for the federal government but doesn’t have to take the civil service examination.” — Ronald Reagan.
"Room service? Send up a larger room."
Rivers are...
the original streaming service.
“Think of stretch marks as pregnancy service stripes.”

– Joyce Armor.
What happens when you cross a cell phone with a skunk?
You get stinky service!
What did Sophocles call his dating service in Ancient Greece?

Oedipal Arrangements.
Why did the witch stay in a hotel during her travels?
She heard they had great broom service.
Why did the hotel staff dress as witches for Halloween?
Because they provided broom service!
What did the nectarine say after the church service? The peacher gave a great sermon!
What's an prisoners favorite battery? Duracell Why are inmates so angry all the time? Cause they have bad cell service.
“Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet service to see who they really are.” —Will Ferrell
Why do you have to wait so long for a train on Halloween? They only run a skeleton service.
Why are ghosts no good at running a railway? A. Because they can’t even put on a skeleton service!
Some local engineers took a train for a service, but the vicar said it was blocking the aisle.

A train track and a motorway walk into a bar. The train track says “a pint for me, please, and one for the road.”
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