Jokes > Tags > Ran

Ran

Did I tell you I ran over my mother-in-law's foot the other day with the lawnmower?
I told my wife we should have buried her deeper.
I got in a fight with a crab yesterday.
When I punched him he ran, goon.
I ran out of toilet paper so I had to start using old newspapers.
The Times are rough.
Why did the Iron Chef have to stop cooking? He ran out of Thyme.
A blond was taking helicopter lessons.
The instructor said, "I'll radio you every 1000 feet to see how you're doing."
At 1000 feet, the instructor radioed her and said she was doing great.
At 2000 feet, he said she was still doing well.
Right before she got to 3000 feet, the propeller stopped, and she twirled to the ground.
The instructor ran to where she crash landed and pulled her out of the helicopter. "What went wrong?"
The blond said, "At 2500 feet, I started to get cold, so I turned the big fan off."
There once was a lady named Dot
Who lived off of pigshit and snot.
When she ran out of these
She ate the green cheese
That she grew on the sides of her twat.
Yo mama so old she ran track with dinosaurs.
I had a really good fantasy football team.
Then, My Luck ran out.
What happened when the football coach’s dog ran onto the field during a game?
He got called for ineligible retriever down field!
I met her in chat, she was neat,
her photo was pretty, petite.
we met for a meal,
I saw her for real,
I screamed and then ran down the street!
There once was a man stuck in a stall,
He tried to get out but would fall.
One day a man flushed,
The fat man just blushed,
And quickly ran out of the mall.
There was a Young Lady of Lucca,
Whose lovers completely forsook her;
She ran up a tree,
And said, 'Fiddle-de-dee!'
Which embarassed the people of Lucca.
There was an Ol Man of Quebec,
A beetle ran over his neck;
But he cried, 'With a needle,
I'll slay you, O beadle!'
That angry Old Man of Quebec.
What did the fish say when it ran into the wall?
Dam.
What did the baby mouse do when she saw a bat?
She ran home and told her mother she saw an angel