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Per Jokes

Utensils Puns
What does a straw and a view have in common?
You can get a paper straw and you can also get pay per view.
Sports Pick Up Lines
I hand out couple assists per game, but never landed on a dime like you
TV Puns
Hey did you hear that ESPN is broadcasting this year's Origami competition?
I heard it's pay per view...
Koala Puns
There once was a koala who could run at a speed of more than 800 miles per hour. He was the first koala to break the sound bearier.
Funny Money Quotes
“Carpe per diem – seize the check.” – Robin Williams.
Clever Jokes
Einstein, Newton, and Pascal decide to play hide-and-seek. Einstein is "It," closes his eyes, counts to 10, and then opens them. Pascal is nowhere to be seen. Newton is sitting right in front of Einstein, with a piece of chalk in his hand. He's sitting in a box drawn on the ground, a meter to one side. Einstein says, "Newton, you're terrible, I've found you!" Newton says, "No no, no. You've found one Newton per square meter. You've found Pascal!"
Salad Puns
So apparently coles has a new thing where you can only have one salad per transaction
They’re calling it coleslaw..
Couch Puns
How many drum sets can you store on a sofa?
One per cushion
Football Puns
If an Octopus were to play football, how many tackles per game would an Octopus have?
Tentacles
Bowling Puns
Bowlers pay a lot of money to play. This is because it is a bum per lane.
Lemon Puns
A lemon got a job in a vinegar factory last week...
Starting salary was $15 per sour.
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