I once asked my grandfather how he'd lived so long He smiled and said; "I sprinkle a little gunpowder on my cereal every morning."
I always thought that was a little weird but he did live a long life and left a great legacy; a thriving career, loving wife, seven children, sixteen grandchildren, two great-grandchildren, and a massive hole in the crematorium wall.
There was a very cautious man Who never laughed or played He never risked, he never tried, He never sang or prayed. And when he one day passed away, His insurance was denied, For since he never really lived, They claimed he never really died.
I once knew a man who lived in a jar. For a stranger sight you’d have to go far. I asked him once why he lived in a jar. He grimaced and said, how bizarre you are. My jar’s so cozy, warm and bright, Even in the full moonlight. The only drawback is, you see, Getting out quickly when I have to pee. (Irwin Mercer)