James Jokes

"Popcorn for breakfast! Why not? It’s a grain. It’s like, like, grits, but with high self-esteem."
– James Patterson
"A perfect summer day is when the sun is shining, the breeze is blowing, the birds are singing, and the lawn mower is broken."
- James Dent
What did James Bond’s mom say as she was giving birth?
"I’ve been expecting you, Mr. Bond."
What is a blue whale’s favourite James Bond Film?
Licence to Krill.
“Always respect Mother Nature. Especially when she weighs 400 pounds and is guarding her baby.”

- James Rollins.
What do you call James Bond taking a bath?
Bubble 07
“I think being a good father is keeping the mother happy so she doesn’t drive the kids crazy.”

- James, ‘Look Who’s Talking.’
“Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them.”

- James Baldwin.
What do you call James Bond with no beard ?
Agent Zero Zero Shaven.
Why does James Bond Have grey hair?
Because there's no time to dye!
“If you pay peanuts, you get monkeys” – James Goldsmith
“There’s a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It’s called marriage” — James Holt McGavran
Why doesn't james bond fart in bed?
Because it'll blow his cover
What’s a whale’s favorite James Bond movie?
A License To Krill.
Why was James Bond kicked out of a toilet?
Because it was not agent's toilet.
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