Cross

Waddaya get when you cross a cowboy with an Egyptian Pharaoh?
Darn Tutankhamun!
The Crucifying Commercial
The Crucifying Commercial Benson runs a nail factory and decides his business needs a bit of advertising. He has a chat with a friend who works in marketing and he offers to make a TV ad for Benson's Nails. "Give me a week," says the friend, "and I'll be back with an ad." A week goes by and the marketing executive comes to see Benson. He opens his laptop and presses play. A Roman soldier is busy nailing Jesus to the cross. He turns to face the camera and says with a grin "Use Benson's Nails, they'll hold anything." Benson goes mad shouting: "What is the matter with you? They'll never show that on TV. Give it another try, but no more Romans crucifying Jesus!" Another week goes by and the marketing man comes back to see Benson with another ad. He turns his laptop around and hits play. This time the camera pans out from a Roman standing with his arms folded to show Jesus on the cross. The Roman looks up at him and says 'Benson's Nails, they'll hold anything'. Benson is beside himself. "You don't understand: I don't want anything with Jesus on the cross! Now listen, I'll give you one last chance. Come back in a week with an advertisement that I can broadcast." A week passes and Benson waits impatiently. The marketing executive arrives and puts on the new video. A naked man with long hair, gasping for breath, is running across a field. About a dozen Roman soldiers come over the hill, hot on his trail. One of them stops, turns to camera and says 'If only we had used Benson's Nails!'.
Why did the skeleton cross the road?
To get to the body shop.
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn't have the guts.
What do you get if you cross a pumpkin with a bigfoot?
A Sasquash.
Why did the pumpkin cross the road? It fell off the wagon!
Why did the Dragon Cross the Road?
He wanted to eat some chicken.
Waddaya get when you cross a cowboy with an Egyptian Pharaoh?
Darn Tutankhamun!
Why Did the Whale Cross the Ocean?
To get to the other tide.
Did you hear about the sea captain who made a special salt-proof boat for the salty waters of the ocean?
It was a sailing solution to cross a saline solution
Why did the worm cross the playground?
To get to the underground slide!
What do you get if you cross a worm and a young goat?
A dirty kid!
What do you get if you cross a glow worm with some beer?
Light ale!
What do you get if you cross a glow worm with a python? A 15 foot strip light that can strangle you to death.
What do you get if you cross a worm and a young goat? A dirty kid.
What do you get if you cross a worm and an elephant? Very big worm holes in your garden.