Club

Little Johnny Describes His Future
Little Johnny Describes His Future A teacher asks her class, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" Little Johnny says "I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the best girl with me, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe, an Infinite Visa Card and to make love to her 3 times a day." The teacher, shocked and not knowing what to do with the bad behavior of this child, decides not to linger on what he said and so continues the lesson. "And you, Susie? What do you want to be?" she asks. "I wanna be Johnny's wife!" Says Susie.
I tried to start a soccer club so I put up some posters on a local bulletin board.
Just to get the ball rolling.
What do you call a group of brains who form a singing group at school?
A glia club.
What do you call a basketball team that cries after they lose the game?
A bawl club.
Is there a bathroom in this tennis club? Because I’m about to drop a deuce.
A Night With a Russian
A Night With a Russian A lovely Russian lady came up to me at the mall and said "Please, I am looking for a one night stand." I had the shop shut up and the door locked before you could say Billybob, and we went to a bar for a couple of aperitifs, a nice restaurant, a club I know where they have a good floorshow, and then I took that lovely lady home and, being a gentleman, I will draw the veil of discretion over what followed. As the sun peeped over the windowsill, I smiled sweetly at her sleepy face and said "So how was that?" "Was wonderful," she said, "but I still have no place to put bedside lamp."
I left chess club early this week.
I was just so board.
The first rule of Tautology club is the first rule of Tautology club.
A bald man walks into the Hair Club. “I’d like to buy a hair piece if the price is right.”
Hair Club Salesperson: “Well sir, how much do you want toupee?”
Marriage is like a game of poker.
At first you have two hearts and a diamond.
By the end all you want is a club and spade.