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Break Jokes

Funny Animal Quotes
“Never break a promise to an animal. They're like babies—they won't understand.”

― Tamora Pierc
Yard Puns
A chicken goes into a library. He stands at the librarian's desk and says, "Buk," so she gives him a book. A couple of minutes later, the chicken returns. "Buk," he says, and she hands him another book. This goes on and on.
Finally, it is the librarian's break time. She goes out back to get some fresh air by the pond. That is when she sees the chicken and a frog on a lilypad. "Buk," says the chicken as he tosses a book to the frog. "Reddit," replies the frog...
Peach Puns
During the summer break, I enrolled myself in a peach coding course.
I asked my nectarine friend how she was doing after her break up and she said 'It's the pits, man.'
Thanksgiving Pick Up Lines
Want to break the wishbone? I’m wishing for a date with you.
Food Quotes
"Strength is the capacity to break a chocolate bar into four pieces with your bare hands - and then eat just one of the pieces."
— Judith Viorst
Monster Puns
Why did the skeletons stay out of the forest?
Because sticks and stones will break their bones.
Funny Parenting Quotes
"A truly appreciative child will break, lose, spoil, or fondle to death any really successful gift within a matter of minutes." – Russell Lynes
“Waking your kids up for school the first day after a break is almost as much fun as birthing them was.” - Jenny McCarthy
“Everyone should have kids. They are the greatest joy in the world, but they are also terrorists. You’ll realize this as soon as they’re born, and they start using sleep deprivation to break you.”

- Ray Romano.
Pot Puns
I bought this strange novelty baking pan shaped like Camelot.
I think I'll break it in by making a castlerole.
Garden Puns
Any self-respecting rock will break at least one shovel before accepting its new home.
Funny Money Quotes
“Waking your kids up for school the first day after a break is almost as much fun as birthing them was.” - Jenny McCarthy
Witch Puns
What happens to witches who break the school rules?
They get ex-spelled.
Movie Pick Up Lines
"Going out with you would be my biggest break since the rural juror."
- 30 Rock
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