When do you serve vegan vitarian matcha-tea-flavored turkey-shaped tofu-loaf?
At Pranksgiving.
What’s the best way to deal with a turkey?
Have it killed and then cran-bury it.
Should you have that annoying distant auntie for Thanksgiving dinner?
It’s really not worth it. Just have the turkey.
What happens when you’re too harsh on the cranberries and make them sad?
They turn into blueberries.
What’s black, white and red?
A Pilgrim blushing because he’d seen the turkey dressing.
What do you call a pilgrims vocabulary? Pilgrammar.
Who doesn't eat on Thanksgiving? A turkey - because it is always stuffed!
What happened the first time one of the settlers tried to write favor instead of favour?
He was attacked by a Pil-grammar nazi.
The native Indians were laughing at the Pilgrims for being so pale and never getting a proper tan.
But they did get a tan. A puritan.