Football is one habit I will never kick.
What do frogs do when they ski?
They rip it.
Ski Area Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, was it Red Bull that gave you wings, or are you just an angel?
What do you call the basketball move where you drink too much alcohol and score?
SlamDrunk!
There is a commonality between a thanksgiving and a bowler guest. They both love turkey.
Where does a fish keep his money In the River Bank!
What do golf and se* have in common?
They’re two things you can enjoy even if you’re bad at both of them.
I can’t believe I framed the ball in for a winner. Shank you!
The only time a basketball team can chase a baseball team is five after nine.
Why was the potato fired from his job at the football stadium?
He was a horrible commentater.
This event is sure to be out of bounds.
Which is the bar downtown that soccer players hate striking on? Crossbar.
Why was the baseball player so good at writing advertising jingles?
Because they're so catchy.
Why did the volleyball player join the marines? To serve our country.
Whatever you do this summer, be sure to make a splash.
Which author is anxious to write the book: Colorado Rockies, World Series Champs?
Ben Whayten.
What do you call it when you've choked on water while jogging every morning this week?
The worst running gag ever.
In a conversation between one pin and another, one said, “Let us never split.”
What did the mathematician do at the baseball game?
Square root for the home team.
Is your eyesight as bad as your cell phone reception? Because that was a terrible call.
What do you call a Spanish football player with no legs?
Gracias.
What is a golfer’s worst nightmare?
The Bogeyman.
Which is the coolest football team in Italy?
AC Milan.
Case in punt
You can’t possibly play soccer in the amazon jungle because there are far too many cheetahs.
Why are fish so smart Because they swim in schools!
What do you call a very slow skier?
A slope-poke.
Why did the kid pursue scuba diving?
Because all his grades are below C-level.
Djokovic to his friends the morning after winning the U.S. Open: Is anyone hungry for some Denny’s? Because I would like another Grand Slam.
What did one hillbilly say to another? I got a new fly rod and reel for my wife. Best trade I ever made.
Good bowlers always keep their minds out of the gutter.
How do you communicate with a fish? Drop it a line!
Why’s it always hot after a football game?
All the fans left.
I quit my job as a scuba diving instructor after my first day at work.
Deep down I realized it wasn’t for me.
What is a golfer’s favorite bird?
Any birdie will do.
Jokes are a lot like American football.
If you haven't gotten anywhere with the first three tries, you'll need to rely on your punner.
Is your nickname cream cheese? Because you’re about to get bageled.
Where can you find a golfer on a Saturday night?
Clubbing.
I know my shot was in. But I won’t argue, because I’m not up for the challenge.
There are many grounds religious children can practice their soccer skills. However, most of them love the prayground.
Prepare to be bowled over.
The only way athletes can stay cool even in a charged game is by standing near the fans.
What do you call it when a football player suffers a career-ending injury in his last game before retirement? Gridirony!
I used to hate tennis, but ever since I’ve started winning 6-0, I love it now.
Did you hear about the fumbled exorcism? The guy retained possession!
Ed Belfour's new contract offer isn't high compared to other goal tenders.
What is the difference between a ball hog and time?
Time passes.
Basketball players manage to remain cool even during tough matches because they stay closer to the fans.
Did you hear about the Owl that could play American football?
It was a superb_owl.
The only difference between time and a ball hog is that the former passes.