I saw the chicken quickly crossing the basketball court? Then I remembered that the referee was blowing fowls.
What is the 7th pin in bowling called? Mother-In-Law!
Why was the nice guy such a lousy baseball player?
Because he never got to home base.
What do volleyball players watch during their free time? They watch Spike TV.
Where can you find a golfer on a Saturday night?
Clubbing.
For instant fun, just add water.
Soviet goaltenders got their hair cut at Vladislav's Tress-shack.
Why do the blondes prefer to have se* instead of bowling?
The balls are lighter, and you don't have to change shoes.
Which superstar has a nose for the puck? Mario the Magsniffascent.
If you golf on election day…
Be sure to cast an absent-tee ballot.
What do you call a Spanish football player with no legs?
Gracias.
Where do players hide their marijuana?
Between the stash marks.
How did the serve know when the bad serve was not with the hand? The server knew it was the foot fault.
If volleyball were easy, they would call it football.
Seven days without playing soccer can make one weak.
What did the bad soccer announcer get for Christmas?
COOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What is a golfer’s favorite dance move?
The Bogey.
Is your nickname cream cheese? Because you’re about to get bageled.
Which Habs great once worked as a janitor? Broom-Broom Geoffrion.
Why did the volleyball player get thrown out of the party? He spiked the punch.
If you make a mistake of playing basketball with pigs, they will hog the ball.
I prefer the new system to reviewing line calls. When Hawk-eye came around, I breathed a big Cy-clops of relief.
As a Brit, I can't get into American football
They rugby the wrong way.
Why are pilots so bad at basketball?
Because they're always traveling.
Do you always play this badly at the net? Because I don’t like your approach.
What did the magician say to the fisherman?
"Pick a cod, any cod."
Golfer: The doctor says I can’t play golf.
Caddie: Oh, he’s played with you, too, eh?
How do crazy runners go through the forest?
They take the psychopath!
What are the rules in zebra baseball?
Three stripes, and you're out.
Why did DPD rush to Coors Field?
They heard somebody stole third base.
How do ski instructors get to work?
By icicle.
Why wasn’t the little pumpkin allowed to swim?
There was no life gourd on duty!
What do you call a woman standing in the middle of a tennis court?
Anette.
Why is a Tornado the best type of football player?
Because it always gets touchdowns.
o my friend Justin was late for the football game.
But that’s okay because he arrived Justin time for kickoff.
In Quebec they used to practise throwing the puck in the zone, and then
sitting back to wait for a turnover. But eventually the players were
criticized for this dump-and-chaise tactic.
Why can't basketball players go on vacation?
They aren't allowed to travel.
What did his wife give the guy when he came home all sweaty from his run?
The stink eye.
Scrambled eggs are similar to a losing basketball team because both are beaten.
A hippie when his opponent disputes his calls: That’s pretty far-out, man!
Why wasn't the jogger all that bummed out when his girlfriend broke up with him?
'Cause they had a good run.
Why couldn't the warden decide whether to allow the prison football team play the professional football team?
The idea had its pros and cons.
What’s the easiest shot in golf?
Your fourth putt.
If the wooden face mask was popularized by Jacques Plante, was the wooden
cup made popular by Jock Plank?
What did the foot say to the football?
I toed you.
They say that you can spike a volleyball. But you can never take away its dig-nity.
Get in the swim this summer.
During holidays, soccer referees send their families yellow cards.
If somebody says "You pitch great for a southpaw," is that a left-handed compliment?
The bowling solder decided to launch a pre-emptive strike.