[Donuts] We’re going the hole nine yards for this game.
Don’t be a wet noodle – join us!
What's the difference between a high-hit baseball and a maggot's father?
One is a pop fly and the other is a fly pop.
Is your eyesight as bad as your cell phone reception? Because that was a terrible call.
Did you hear about the rundown swimming pool?
It was a real dive!
You can never get short balls over the net! Solution: Drop shot from arsenal.
Did you hear about the Owl that could play American football?
It was a superb_owl.
I hate scuba diving.
It was the lowest moment of my life.
What do apres-ski participants in white-out blizzard conditions eat for lunch?
Icebergers. BRR!
A goal new ball game I he a kick outta you
Which is the coolest football team in Italy?
AC Milan.
The bowling solder decided to launch a pre-emptive strike.
How is it that elephants are always ready for a swim?
They never forget their trunks!
They call me Ace, because you just got served.
Seven days without playing soccer can make one weak.
Join us for plenty of play action.
Hope you’re wide open on [date].
Why are football players not allowed in bowling alleys?
After getting a strike, they spike the ball.
Cold Ski Pun of the Day: I'm tired of slalom skiing. Alpine over another telemark now.
Chairlift Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, is it really windy up here, or are you just blowing me away?
I’m a baseliner and I don’t know how to volley: my game would disappear if I went to no-man’s land.
Which Star Wars movie is a baseball player's least favorite?
The Umpire Strikes Back.
The moto of their school bowling team was ‘let’s knock em down’.
Why did the basketball player sign up for a crafting class?
He wanted to learn how to make baskets.
What kind of insect is bad at football?
A fumble-bee.
The judge sentenced the basketball player to life imprisonment because he shot the ball.
Is there a bathroom in this tennis club? Because I’m about to drop a deuce.
What trophy do you get if you never score any points? The Art Rouse.
What is a volleyball player’s favorite drink? Sets on the Beach.
What do you call it when a football player suffers a career-ending injury in his last game before retirement? Gridirony!
Which rangy centre could cover the whole ice? Jean Umbrelliveau.
An orange and an apple signed up for a tournament. No one was surprised to find out they were both seeded.
And yes, gnomes are always trying to get to first base with the ladies.
What does Darth Vader say when he plays volleyball? May the spike be with you.
Why couldn't the garden gnome run in the marathon?
Because he's not part of the human race!
What did the magician say to the fisherman?
"Pick a cod, any cod."
What did the marathoner do after he won the race?
He decided to go into politics and run for office.
If you golf on election day…
Be sure to cast an absent-tee ballot.
What might folks in Tokyo find between Godzilla's toes?
Slow runners.
Everyone is getting so paranoid, and diving into conspiracy theories lately...
Must be something in the water.
Which trophy has the most glitz? The Lady Bling.
We had an argument on our way back from the tournament. Our position is that their goal was stopping ours.
What is the favorite sport for the young bass? It is the bass get ball.
Poor white splash.
Why do volleyball players join the military? They want to gain extra experience in the service.
What do a great hitter and a boxer have in common?
Both are serious sluggers.
Why did the volleyball player cross the street? There were players on the other side.
I got so mad at my partner hitting moonballs, I had to pusher off the court.
There are many grounds religious children can practice their soccer skills. However, most of them love the prayground.
If you want to impress the crowd, hit overheads. Every point will be a smash hit.
Opposing coaches facing the Leafs in the 60s and 70s knew that Dave was the
one to Keon.