A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than the men who mention it.
Wives want to videotape the birth of their child, while husbands want to videotape the conception.
Why do men have 2 heads and women 4 lips? Cause men do all the thinking and women do all the talking.
How do men define a "50/50" relationship? We cook-they eat; we clean-they dirty; we iron-they wrinkle.
What do you call a group of men waiting for a haircut? A barbercue
My ex husband went to a colonoscopy the other day.
Good news: They found his head!
If a woman sleeps with 10 men she's a slut, but if a man does it… He's gay, definitely gay.
Ice hockey is basically just guys wearing knife shoes fighting each other with long sticks for the last Oreo.
I asked my wife if she ever fantasizes about me, she said yes - about me taking out the trash, mowing the lawn, and doing the dishes.
The best way to get your husband to do something is to suggest he’s too old to do it.
Why don't women blink during se*? There isn't enough time.
A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.
An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position.
As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically,
"Relatives of yours?"
"Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws."
What do you call a Roman soldier with a smile on his face and a piece of hair between his two front teeth? A GLAD-HE-ATE-HER
How can you tell if your man is happy? Who cares?
What do you give a man with everything? Penicillin.