It’s so hot that the oven got jealous.
It’s so hot that my sprinkler released steam.
It’s so hot firecrackers light themselves.
It’s so hot I saw the Devil in Wal-Mart buying an air conditioner.
It’s so hot they installed a fan in the debt ceiling.
It’s so hot that my chocolate milk is now hot cocoa.
It’s so hot that you can’t make a chili dog.
It’s so hot that I renamed my pig “Bacon.”
It’s so hot Adam and Eve traded their fig leaves for ice cubes.
It’s so hot I saw a squirrel picking up nuts with potholders.
It’s so hot you realize asphalt has a liquid state.
It’s so hot you can pull a leaf off a tree and iron with it.
It’s so hot the cows are producing evaporated milk.
It's so hot outside the ice cream man just change the sign on the side of his truck to "cream."