It’s so hot that I renamed my pig “Bacon.”
It’s so hot they installed a fan in the debt ceiling.
It’s so hot Adam and Eve traded their fig leaves for ice cubes.
It’s so hot I saw the Devil in Wal-Mart buying an air conditioner.
It’s so hot the cows are producing evaporated milk.
It’s so hot I started putting ice cubes in my waterbed.
It’s so hot everyone is wearing sweat pants.
It’s so hot I almost called my ex so I could be around something shady.
It’s so hot I saw a chicken lay an omelet.
It’s so hot granny broke wind just to have a little breeze.
It's so hot I saw an Amish guy buy an air conditioner.
It’s so hot you can wash and dry your clothes at the same time.
It’s so hot you discover that it only takes 2 fingers to drive your car.
It’s so hot that corn on the stalks starts popping.