What does Chuck Norris say when fishing?
"you, you and you, get out."
Chuck Norris has died aged 79.
But Death is too scared to let him know.
M.C. Hammer learned the hard way that Chuck Norris CAN touch this.
In Pamplona, Spain, the people may be running from the bulls, but the bulls are running from Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can hear sign language.
Chuck Norris can hit you so hard your blood will bleed.
Chuck Norris has a diary. It's called the Guinness Book of World Records.
If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever.
Chuck Norris makes onions cry.
It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.
Chuck Norris once ordered a steak in a restaurant. The steak did what it was told.
Chuck Norris has died.
He has since recovered from this mild inconvenience.
This morning Chuck Norris was shot.
Check the news, The bullet is in critical condition
Chuck Norris spices up his steaks with pepper spray.
Have you heard that Chuck Norris has started building non-sqaure homes?
He's on a round house kick.
Chuck Norris can slam revolving doors.
Chuck Norris caught COVID.
But then he felt bad, so he let it go.
Chuck Norris used to beat up his shadow because it was following too close. It now stands 15 feet behind him.
Chuck Norris’ cowboy boots are made from real cowboys.
Some kids pee their name in the snow. Chuck Norris can pee his name in dry concrete.
Chuck Norris is the only person that can punch a cyclops between the eye.
Chuck Norris fell down from a 10 story building.
people start gathering around him, asking "What happened? what happened?"
Chuck: "Don't know, I just got here."
Chuck Norris once round-house kicked a salesman. Over the phone.
The reason the Holy Grail has never been recovered is because nobody is brave enough to ask Chuck Norris to give up his favourite coffee mug.
Chuck Norris can drown a fish.
Why did Chuck Norris cross the road?
He didn't. The road moved back underneath him.
Chuck Norris can stand at the bottom of a bottomless pit.
Chuck Norris doesn't pet any animals. Animals pet themselves when he approaches them.
Chuck Norris' dog is trained to pick up his own poop because Chuck Norris will not take shit from anyone.
Chuck Norris once went to mars. Thats why there are no signs of life.
If Chuck Norris were to travel to an alternate dimension in which there was another Chuck Norris and they both fought, they would both win.
Chuck Norris doesn't have good aim. His bullets just know better than to miss.
Chuck Norris can dribble a bowling ball.
When Bruce Banner gets mad he turns into the Hulk. When the Hulk gets mad he turns into Chuck Norris. When Chuck Norris gets mad, run.
Chuck Norris caught Covid-19 yesterday
The virus is quarantined for two weeks
Did you know Chuck Norris was in every star wars movie?
He played the force.
Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11.... a suicide.
Chuck Norris fell into a black hole.
The black hole couldn't escape.
What happens when Chuck Norris lifts Thor Hammer?
The hammer explodes because it is not worthy.
Chuck Norris can only have Chuck Norris as babies.
Because all of his genes are dominant.
Chuck Norris beat the sun in a staring contest.
Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light
When Chuck Norris goes skydiving
the earth falls toward him.
Chuck Norris once trew a party.
It still hasn't landed.
Chuck Norris was bitten by the worlds most venemous snake.
After hours of excruciating pain and misery, the snake died.
Chuck Norris's Blood Type is AK-47.
When Chuck Norris enters the room, even the chairs are standing up.
What was going through the minds of all of Chuck Norris' victims before they died?
His Shoe.
Chuck Norris's computer has no "backspace" button, Chuck Norris doesn't make mistakes.
Chuck refers to himself in the fourth person.