In Pamplona, Spain, the people may be running from the bulls, but the bulls are running from Chuck Norris.
Some kids pee their name in the snow. Chuck Norris can pee his name in dry concrete.
A bulletproof vest wears Chuck Norris for protection.
If it looks like chicken, tastes like chicken, and feels like chicken but Chuck Norris says its beef, then it's beef.
Chuck Norris can hear sign language.
Chuck Norris doesn't pet any animals. Animals pet themselves when he approaches them.
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he’s pushing the Earth down.
In the Beginning there was nothing … then Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked nothing and told it to get a job.
Chuck Norris' keyboard doesn't have a Ctrl key, because nothing controls Chuck Norris.
The only time Chuck Norris was ever wrong was when he thought he had made a mistake.
Champions are the breakfast of Chuck Norris.
What kind of House does Chuck Norris live in?
A Round House.
Have you heard that Chuck Norris has started building non-sqaure homes?
He's on a round house kick.
On the 7th day, God rested … and Chuck Norris took over.
Chuck Norris can pick oranges from an apple tree and make the best lemonade youve ever tasted.
The real reason Hitler killed himself is because he found out that Chuck Norris is Jewish.
Chuck Norris can hit you so hard your blood will bleed.
When Chuck Norris goes scuba diving
He gives the water the bends.
Chuck Norris does not own a stove, oven, or microwave , because revenge is a dish best served cold.
Chuck Norris caught COVID.
But then he felt bad, so he let it go.
Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.
Chuck Norris changed a lightbulb...
With one hand he held the bulb, with the other he turned the house.
Chuck Norris can dribble a bowling ball.
When Chuck Norris smokes a joint
the weed gets high of Chuck Norris.
Waldo once insulted chuck norris.
And we all know how THAT'S going.
Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
When Chuck Norris was born he drove his mom home from the hospital.
Chuck Norris once bowled a perfect game with a marble.
Chuck Norris doesn't cheat death. He wins fair and square.
Chuck Norris can start a fire with an ice cube.
Chuck Norris can speak French... In Russian.
Chuck Norris doesnt eat honey, he chews bees.
Chuck Norris has a mug of nails instead of coffee in the morning.
Chuck Norris won a 10 minute race after giving his competitors a 10 minute head start.
Chuck Norris’ calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, because no one fools Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris's Blood Type is AK-47.
Chuck Norris once trew a party.
It still hasn't landed.
The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It didn’t work.
Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
Before he forgot to bring a gift for Chuck Norris, Santa Claus was real.
Chuck Norris doesn't hoard toilet paper.
He's used the same napkin since 1974. He just scares the sh*t out of it.
Chuck Norris makes onions cry.
Death once had a near-Chuck-Norris experience.
Big foot claims he saw Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can have both feet on the ground and kick butt at the same time
Chuck Norris walks into a bar...
The bar breaks in half.
It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.
Chuck Norris once ordered a steak in a restaurant. The steak did what it was told.
Chuck Norris can speak braille.
Since 1940, the year Chuck Norris was born, roundhouse kick related deaths have increased 13,000 percent.