Knock knock.
Come in.
Have you ever noticed that when geese fly in a ‘V’ formation, one line is always longer than the other? That's because there are more geese in that line.
Why did Benjamin get sick after eating too much ice cream? He was lactose intolerant.
What has five fingers and looks human?
A severed hand.
A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks “why the long face?”.
The horse replies “My wife is leaving me and I just got fired."
Why did the Catholic priest get sent to jail?
Tax evasion.
Why was John always at the casino? He’s addicted to gambling.
A man walks into a library to get a book on suicide.
The librarian says “Do you have a library card?” The man says “no” and leaves.
What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?
Hand of the buyer with a piece of cheese in the store