“This has been such a Monday! I wish I stayed in bed, and I wish that yesterday had never happened.”
– Lisa Mantchev
“Sunday morning my head is bad. But it's worth all the time I had. But I've got to go and get some rest. For Monday is a mess!”
– Dave Bartholomew, Blue Monday
“Mondays are a lot like getting fat. They make you feel sad, sometimes angry and there is not much scope for liking either fat or Mondays for any reason.”
– Garry Moll
“Monday is a sloppy umbrella day, which makes everybody a little blue.”
– George Leedy
“Dear Monday, I want to break up. I’m seeing Tuesday and dreaming about Friday. Sincerely, it’s not me, it’s you.”
“Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life!”
“Monday is great if I can spend it in bed. I’m a man of simple pleasures, really.”
– Arthur Darvill
“I have decided to cast my vote for any political candidate whose platform adds Monday to the weekend.”
“Monday: One of those days when even when your coffee needs a coffee.”
“Candy is nature’s way of making up for Mondays.”
— Rebecca Gober
“You are in control. Never allow your Monday to be manic.”
— Andrea L’Artiste
“So. Monday. We meet again. We will never be friends—but maybe we can move past our mutual enmity toward a more-positive partnership.”
— Julio Alexi Genao
“When life gives you Monday, dip it in glitter and sparkle all day.”
“May your coffee be extra strong, and your Monday be extra short.”
“Someone should enact a holiday that honors all people who turn up for work on Mondays.”
“Hello and welcome to Monday. Do you take sugar, cream, or Valium in your morning coffee?”
“At the end of a rainbow, there’s a pot of gold. But when the weekend comes to an end, there’s only a Monday.”
“Dear Mondays, I really think that you should take a holiday. Believe me, no one will even miss you.”
“Unfortunately, I did not become a millionaire over the weekend, so I have to return to work on Monday.”
“I’ve drank multiple cups of coffee, and Monday isn’t looking any better. Hey – give me a beer. Let’s see if that helps.”
“We interrupt your happiness to bring you Mondays. Don’t worry, you’re regularly scheduled happiness will resume again on Friday.”
“Take a deep breath and try to relax. I promise – Monday will be over soon.”
“Is it Monday already? I’m almost positive I did not get my entire portion of the weekend.”
“I really don’t play well with others on a Monday. Can I skip today and just start again with Tuesday?”
“If I was elected president, the first thing I would do would be to eliminate all Mondays and lengthen the weekend one more day.”
“What is your favorite day of the week, and why it is your favorite day of the week? Mine is Tuesday because that means Monday is gone.”
“I don’t like when I'm all stress-free and peacefully relaxing on the couch and then, out of nowhere, Monday comes along and punches you right off the couch!”
“I'm always in a bad mood on Monday morning. It makes me hate everything for no reason whatsoever.”
“Monday, you're so jealous of my relationship with Sunday because I am so happy to see you leave!”
“I don’t like Sunday nights because you have to wake up to a Monday morning.”
“Set your clocks at the start of the weekend so that you know just how much fun time you get to have. Then smash your clocks so you won't know when Monday starts.”
“If Monday was a gift, I would happily return it to the person who gave it to me.”
“Roses are red, Mondays are hard. I’m not good at poetry. COFFEE.”
“Keep calm and pretend it’s not Monday.”
“Why is Monday so far from Friday? And why is Friday so close to Monday?”
“The only certainty in this life is that Monday comes for everyone. A little humor to face at the beginning of the week always goes well. How about starting Monday smiling?”
“Mondays are mundane, like Tuesdays minus 24 hours.”
— Jarod Kintz
“I really need a day in-between Sunday and Monday.”
“It’s just another manic Monday. I wish it was Sunday. ‘Cause, that’s my fun day. My, I don’t have to run day.”
— Prince Rogers Nelson
“SMONDAY: The moment when Sunday stops feeling like a Sunday and the anxiety of Monday kicks in.”
“What is your favorite day of the week, and why it is your favorite day of the week? Mine is Tuesday because that means Monday is gone.”
“Never make your favorite song the alarm for Monday morning; you’ll hate it for years.”
“Monday again? Is it every week now?”
“Enjoy every second of Sunday, for when you least expect Monday comes to haunt you.”
“Monday is almost Tuesday, which is not so far from Wednesday which is neighboring Thursday, and Friday. Enjoy your day!”
“The worst moment today has happened. That was when the alarm went off and I realized it was Monday.”
“If Monday were a person, it would be a boring friend who always forces us to do what we don’t want.”
“So. Monday. We meet again. We will never be friends — but maybe we can move past our mutual enmity toward a more positive partnership.”
“If each day is a “gift,” I’d like to know where I can return the Monday.”
“My Week is like: Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Blink, Monday.”