Hey, remember back when we were a thing… Yeah… Good times.
Wanna see a magic trick? Abrakadabra, you're single now.
"I just can't take the bad lovemaking anymore".
Hey baby, I think I'm going blind. Because I can't see you anymore.
"You're not Mr. Right.... just Mr. Right Now."
Do those legs go all the way? Because you should use them to go away.
"Really, our time together has just become more effort than you're worth."
You look like my future ex wife.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Girl its been fun
But im leaving you
Roses are red
Violets are blue
You made my life a mess
Please call a clean-up crew
Remember when I asked you out? Well, I was talking to the girl behind you.
Are you a stop watch? Because our time is up.
Hey, let's hold a costume party. You can be a bank, and I can be alone!
Baby are you an angel? Because I'm a atheist.
Girl you're looking like a snack and I'm going on a diet.
Hey baby, you know what sounds good? You and me never speaking to each other again.
Hear that sound? (cup hand to ear) Yep- that's a dump truck, and it's coming for you!
Hey, are you an anchor? Because you've done nothing but weigh me down.
Aside from being single, what do you do for a living?
"There's something I've been wanting to say since the day we met - goodbye."
This relationship is kinda like the Superbowl LIII halftime show; I can’t wait for it to be over.
I really like you. So does my wife.
"Look, our relationship is like doing push ups on your knees. It's just not working out"
Let’s make like a banana and split.
Here, look at this blank piece of paper for a second… I wrote every reason why we should stick together on it.
We must be a cast on a spiral fracture, girl. Because we’re on a serious break.
Hey baby, remember how you said that you can’t live without me? Well, it’s time to get your affairs in order….
"My cat doesn't like you."
Whoa, Heaven must be missing an angel! Because you’re dead to me.
"Maybe this is not the right time for us"
"Is it hot in here or is this relationship suffocating me?"
"Hey baby, are you being followed? Because I've been seeing people behind your back."
What’s the difference between me and your socks? I’m not yours anymore.
I don’t know what I’d do without you, but starting tomorrow I’m going to give it a try.
You are so right. And I am so left.
We should make like your parents and split.
Roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and so were you... but now the roses are wilted the violets are dead the sugar bowls empty and so is your head.
Hey, baby. I'm calling myself Han because you need to be Solo.
"Sorry I stopped contacting you. I had to go back to rehab."
Hey Pumpkin, I just wanted to say that I'm done with having Halloween every day.
Hey baby, are you in a tunnel? Because we’re breaking up.
I will always cherish my initial misconceptions of you.
What do deer doctors specialise in? Hart surgery!
Girl: Want to see a magic trick?
Boyfriend: Sure.
Girl: Poof you're single.
There's something I've been wanting to say since the day we met. Goodbye.
It's not you...it's your taste in music.
We should make like the Soviet Union and split up.
"I took a gamble and chose you, now i believe I made a bad bet."
I think it would be hot if we f**ked other people. Exclusively.
Do you believe in love at first sight? How about misery after three years?