Write

There are so many jokes about classical composers I could write you a Liszt.
Did you hear about the notebook who married a pencil? She finally found Mr. Write.
What happened the first time one of the settlers tried to write favor instead of favour?

He was attacked by a Pil-grammar nazi.
I have been trying to write a new pizza joke…
But I can’t work out the delivery.
The Teacher had asked the class to write an essay about an unusual event that happened during the past week.
Little Johnny got up to read his.
It began, "My daddy fell in a well last week."
"Good Lord!" the teacher exclaimed. "Is he OK?"
"He must be," said Little Johnny. "He stopped calling for help yesterday."
My therapist told me that a great way to let go of your anger is to write letters to people you hate and then burn them. I did that and I feel much better but I'm wondering... do I keep the letters?
Golf: a game where you yell fore, you get six, and you write five.
There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer.
When asked to define "Great" he said,
"I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!"
He now works for Microsoft, writing error messages.
How many biologists does it take to change a light bulb? Four. One to change it and three to write the environmental-impact statement.
You use computers.
IPods, mobiles, cameras.
Why not write letters?
I'm trying to write a joke about unemployed people, but it needs more work.
What did the bowl of soup write on their Valentine?
I love you pho real.
Which author is anxious to write the book: Colorado Rockies, World Series Champs?
Ben Whayten.
Little Johnny asked his father, "Dad, can you write in the dark?"
His father said, "I think so. What do you want me to write?"
Little Johnny replied, "Oh, just sign this report card for me..."
There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer.
When asked to define "Great" he said,
"I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!"
He now works for Microsoft, writing error messages.