Win Jokes

Q. Why did the girl-illa win the beauty contest?
A. She was beast of show!
How did Gertie Gorilla win the beauty contest? She was the beast of the show!
Why did the Ghosts win the soccer match? They scored more Ghouls.
The zombie worked for years to win this prize. He showed real dead-ication.
Hey girl. I won this gold medal, but I'd really like to win your heart.
Who would win a game of hide and seek between a dalmatian and a tiger? The tiger because he wouldn't be spotted.
Whenever I see you my heart races. I hope to win first place.
Hey, are you Oscar? Because I really want to win you...
"If I win, I get to take you home. If you win, you can come home with me."
- Trees Lounge (1996)
I bought a parrot but he has a foul mouth.
I let him loose so that he could fly South.
But he came home again.
This proves that I can't win.
He says the F word two hundred times a day.
He offends everybody and drives them away.
Nobody will take this bird even though I offer to pay them.
I'm going out of my mind, it looks like I'm stuck with him.
I have the only parrot on Earth that's a sinner.
If he doesn't shut up, he's going to be my dinner.
Who would win in a fight between a kangaroo and a zebra?
The zebra. Because he has so many black belts.
How does a kangaroo win a gold medal?
In the long jump.
Why did a can of nuts win the part in the Christmas pageant? Because they were the best nut-tavity actors.
Why did the female chef win the cook-off?
Because cheese grater!
If we raced, I would let you win, so I could get a good view from the back.
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