Whether Jokes

There was an Old Man of the Wrekin
Whose shoes made a horrible creaking
But they said, 'Tell us whether,
Your shoes are of leather,
Or of what, you Old Man of the Wrekin?'
"I don’t know whether they should say “You have a baby” or “The baby has you”." ~ Anonymous
What are you doing hanging out in aisle 3? You clearly belong in aisle 9. Aisle 10 is within arm's reach but that all depends on whether or not you'll have dinner with me.
I got fired from my job because I kept asking my customers whether they would prefer “Smoking” or “Non-smoking”.
Apparently the correct terms are “Cremation” and “Burial”.
I'm debating whether I should cross the river on foot or use my rowboat...
It's row v. wade.
If you doubt whether bowling is a sport, get it from me, that yes, it is a sport, but for people who have talent to spare.
I can't decide whether to grill chicken breasts or chicken thighs...
I guess I'll just wing it
An onion just told me a joke.
I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
When I told my friend an onion pun, he started crying. I asked whether they were tears of happiness?
It doesn't matter whether you are tall, short, fat, thin, rich, poor; at the end of the day...
It's night.
"I’ve done the calculation and your chances of winning the lottery are identical whether you play or not." ~ Fran Lebowitz
Why couldn't the warden decide whether to allow the prison football team play the professional football team?
The idea had its pros and cons.
“I find that ducks’ opinion of me is greatly influenced by whether I have bread."
- Mitch Hedberg
My neighbours listen to terrific music... Whether they like it or not.
How do you decide whether to be a Brain Surgeon or a Novelist?
You flip a coin. It’ll land on heads or tales.
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