I only date blind people. It's the only way to make sure they're not seeing other lovers.
"I'm divorcing my wife. I've had enough, I'm going to leave her." "Why?" "She's out every night, going to the bars in town way past midnight and I'm fed up with it". "What's she doing?" "She's looking for me!"
Why did Dorothy get lost on her way to the Emerald City? Becuase she was being led by three boys
How does a man show he's planning for the future? He buys an extra case of beer. What do you call the useless piece of skin on a penis? The man. Why did God give men penises? So they'd have at least one way to shut a woman up.
What's the best way to force a male to do sit ups? Put the remote control between his toes.