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Surprised Jokes

Peach Puns
Which word can be used to describe a peach that is surprised, shocked, or angry with strong emotion? – Speachless!
Dirty Holiday Pick Up Lines
I'll show you where Easter eggs come from - you may be surprised!
Diving Puns
I surprised the judges at my last diving competition by performing a cannonball.
I made a huge splash.
Irish Puns
I told my friend that our old school friend is coming to attend St Patrick's feast. She was surprised. She asked, "O'Reilly?"
Lightning Puns
I was surprised when I saw a man get struck by lightning.

The man was shocked as well.
Orange Puns
An apple and an orange signed up for a tournament. No one was really surprised when they had both were seeded.
Onion Puns
I was surprised at the number of onions needed for this dish- it calls for shallot of onions.
I was very surprised to hear those insane rapping skills from my green onions. It had lived up to its name of rapscallion.
Color Puns
I was surprised that although I was supposed to be feeling blue, my heart was not that heavy. Perhaps, I am feeling light blue.
I was really surprised when I learned that singer Pink's favorite color was actually green. No one could have i-magenta-it.
Spine Puns
I surprised my friend as she was trying to steal another spine from a corpse...
She was takin' a back when taken aback!
Bit surprised by the free printer I got with my new computer. He’s called Arthur and he’s worked in newspapers for 14 years.
Head Puns
I'm surprised you all aren't talking more about that drug with the side effect of making scalps wrinkled.
I mean, it's been making a LOT of head lines.
Dirty Short Jokes
A family was driving behind a garbage truck when a dildo flies out and thumped against the windshield...
Embarrassed, and to spare her young son's innocence, the mother turns around and says, "Don't worry, dear. That was just an insect."

"Wow," the boy replies. "I'm surprised it could get off the ground with a penis like that!"
Spouse Puns
I told my wife she drew her eyebrows too high...
She looked surprised.
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