Strength Jokes

If you try to stretch a fork to see if it breaks...
Are you testing its utensil strength?
I designed a dungeons and dragons weapon for wizards. It's a magical melee weapon shaped like a tome that uses intellect for damage instead of strength.
I call it "Book Club"
Ever wonder how gorillas can be so strong when they eat mostly a plant based diet?
Cuz they don't monkey around when it comes to strength training!
What did ketchup say while spotting his friend at the gym?
Mustard all of your strength!
The Italian and the Insatiable Woman
The Italian and the Insatiable Woman An Italian guy is out picking up women in Rome. While at his favorite bar, he manages to attract one rather attractive looking blonde. So they’re back at his place, and sure enough, they go at it. After they are done the Italian sits back pleased. Then he rolls over, lights up a cigarette and asks her, “So… you finish?” After a slight pause. She replies, “No.” Surprised, but pleasantly, he puts out his cigarette, rolls back on top of her, and has his way with her again, this time lasting even longer than the first. Again he rolls over, lights a cigarette, and asks, “So…. you finish?” And again, after a short pause, she simply says “No.” Stunned, but still acting reflexively on his macho pride, he once again puts out the cigarette, and mounts his companion du jour. This time, with all the strength he could muster up, he barely manages to end the task, but he does, after quite some time and energy is spent. Barely able to roll over, he reaches for his cigarette … lights it again, and then asks tiredly, “So….....please.... you FINISH?” “No no, I’m Swedish!” Says the blonde.
When god gave out bodies, he did it in alphabetical order.
GOD: And to you, horse, I give you a golden mane, great strength and speed, and a giant gait. You will be the noblest of beasts, and men will love you.

HORSEFLY (next in line): Oh man this is gonna be gooood.
The CEO, the Employee and the Rock Climbing
The CEO, the Employee and the Rock Climbing A CEO went on a rock climbing trip with one of his employees. The CEO, an experienced climber, reached the top of a difficult section and was holding a rope tied to both men. As the employee was climbing up, he lost his grip, and was only saved by the strength of the CEO who was barely able to hang on. The CEO yelled, "Hurry, I'm losing my grip!", but the employee was so scared he couldn't find a handhold. The CEO yelled, "I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to let you go." The employee, accepting his fate, was praying when a wad of cash hit him in the face. He yelled to the CEO, "What the hell is this for?" The CEO, while cutting the rope, replied, "It's your severance pay."
Two hot dogs were having a race. One overtook the other, who called out “I see you’ve mustard the strength to ketchup with me!”
The Wheelbarrow Bet
The Wheelbarrow Bet A strong young man at a construction site was bragging that he could out do anyone in a feat of strength. He made a special case of making fun of one of the older workmen. After several minutes, the older worker had enough. 'Why don't you put your money where your mouth is,' he said. 'I will bet a week's wages that I can haul something in a wheelbarrow over to that building that you won't be able to wheel back. 'You're on, old man,' the braggart replied. Let's see you do it.' The old man reached out and grabbed the wheelbarrow by the handles. Then, nodding to the young man, he said, 'All right, dumbass, get in.'
I find my core strength in you.
What's the difference between a Roman and an Irish Catholic?
The strength of the communion wine.
I designed a dungeons and dragons weapon for wizards. It's a magical melee weapon shaped like a tome that uses intellect for damage instead of strength.
I call it "Book Club"
Another candle on your cake?
Well, that's no cause to pout.
Be glad that you have strength enough
To blow the d*** thing out.
I think I can stop my risedronate from now on because you have significantly increased my bone strength.
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