Somewhere Jokes

When I got home last night my wife demanded that I 'take her somewhere expensive'...
So I took her to a petrol station.
Do you have the thyme? I need to get somewhere around tree o’clock.
Will you be the sun in my life? Then stay millions of miles away from me.
I think this has been said somewhere else.
I swear I saw one of those mythical creatures somewhere in the bush; but when I came back, it was uni-gone.
I heard the King of spain caught Covid...
Heard he tested positive while on his plane going somewhere, now he has to quarantine there.

So the Reign in Spain remains solely on the Plane.
Why do blondes wear hooped ear rings. So they have somewhere to put their feet when having se*.
“I eat cake every day because somewhere out there it’s someone’s birthday and I like to celebrate.”
― Unknown
I lost my wrist watch somewhere near my house.
Now it’s the neighborhood watch.
"A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere."
My husband said to me, "For our anniversary I want to go somewhere I've never been before."
So I said, "Try the kitchen!"
- Dad, where are the DVDs? Where's Shrek, I want to watch it.
- Somewhere ogre there.
Where do you go to weigh a pie? Somewhere over the rainbow.
A dog and his bone was on the roam,
Where can I find this bone a home?
Will I bury it next to the tree?
No, too easy for others to see.

What about next to the garden shed?
Maybe in the middle of the garden bed,
Behind the sty where the pigs all are,
What about somewhere right away far.

I think I know what I will do,
I'll just sit down and have a chew,
Tomorrow will be another new day,
I'll find a spot then for the bone to stay.

(John Williams)
Why don’t we go somewhere where I can stick a candle in your jack-o-lantern?
“A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere.”
Groucho Marx
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