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Sat

I sat on some peas in the car. It was a bumpea ride.
I was driving through the safari park when my sat nav said “bear left”. It was clearly a zebra.
What did the tired witch do?
She sat down for a spell.
Old McDonald's Farm
Old McDonald's Farm Two Army football players were given a special SAT test to meet their admission requirements to the Military Academy. Soon after the test began the first guy turns to the second guy and asks, “Old MacDonald had a what?” The other replies, “He had a farm.” The first asks, “How do you spell it?” To which the second replied, “E-I-E-I-O.”
Did you hear about the butcher who sat on his bacon slicer?
He got a little behind in his deliveries.
What did the werewolf say when he sat on sandpaper?
- Ruff!
I bought a 400 year-old chair from Italy,
but as soon as I sat on it, it baroque.
“The only thing that ever sat its way to success was a hen.” — Sarah Brown
I accidentally sat on a medieval stained glass window at the antique store...
That was a royal pane in the ass.
Did you hear about the man who sat next to his clone on the train?
He was beside himself.
I had a real problem when your mom got rid of that crooked chair my dad made.
I don't know why, it just never sat right with me.
My husband hated my impulse purchase of a revolving chair, but then he sat on it.
Eventually he came around.
What happened to the skeleton who sat by the fire for too long?
He became bone dry.
After buying grocers, I sat on the San Francisco pier and pondered life. My laundry detergent tipped over...
Now I’m sittin on the dock of a bay, watching my Tide roll away.
A blonde walked into the dentist office and sat down in a chair.
The dentist said "Open Wide" "I can't" The blonde said. "This chair has arms"
My wife got a straw for her drink...
When she sat down, she took a sip, and frustratedly sighed "My straw has a hole in it!"
I replied "I should hope it has two!"
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