Have you ever played quiet tennis?
It's just like regular tennis but without the racket.
A Russian man goes to the secret police and says, “My talking parrot disappeared.”

“Why did you come here? Go to the regular police.”

“I will. I’m just here to tell you that I disagree with whatever that parrot is going to say.”
What is a lightyear?
The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
"Son eat the vegetables,they're good for you."
"But dad,they taste just like regular people."
What does someone mean by a light year? The same as a regular year, but with less calories and fat.
What type of car would a regular horse buy?
A Fjord Focus.
I said to my wife, "I need to call the doctor today."
"Which doctor?" she asked.
"No, the regular kind."
There was an Old Man in a tree,
Who was horribly bored by a Bee;
When they said, 'Does it buzz?'
He replied, 'Yes, it does!'
'It's a regular brute of a Bee!'
Me: I have an appointment to see the doctor.
Nurse: which doctor?

Me: No, just the regular one