Once there was a doctor who got shot. He adamantly wanted to perform surgery on himself, despite all of the other surgeons saying that he shouldn't. But he was so insistent that they finally said "Fine, suture self."
Did you know that doctors that perform circumscisions don’t make a lot of money for those operations? They only get paid in tips.
A quadriplegic man became famous playing beautiful piano classics with only his nose, ears, chin, and forehead. Before going on stage to perform, his tour manager would say, "Alright John. It's time to face the music."