Inside Jokes

What rock would you find inside a garden shed?
Shedimentary.
For our anniversary, I gave my girlfriend a picture of me inside a pistachio. But that’s just me in a nutshell.
Tying the legs together will keep the inside moist.
What goes inside elves’ pointy shoes?
Their mistletoes.
I'm just like an Easter bunny - sweet, but hollow on the inside.
Onions are unable to store water inside them because there is always a leek.
“Outside of a dog, a book is a man’s best friend. Inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read.”
Groucho Marx
Why did king Minos put Minotaur inside a labyrinth?
He wanted to amaze his wife.
"Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read."
“Best Friend: One million memories, ten thousand inside jokes, one hundred shared secrets.”
— Unknown
“Best Friend: One million memories, ten thousand inside jokes, one hundred shared secrets.”
— Unknown
How many peaches can you fit inside two cans? It depends how big the Toucans are and if they eat peaches.
Where do you store peach juice? Inside of a peach-er.
Where do you put nectarines when you want to freeze them? Inside the peach-zer.
How to Get the Husband Hot and Heavy Two women are talking about their love life over coffee. "I don't know what to do.." groans Margie, "I'm too shy to ask for it, and he doesn't initiate enough!" "Well," said her friend Sharon, "I have a surefire way to start up my husband." "Oh?" asks Margie, "DO tell!" "Well," smirks Sharon, "I just sit next to him and then I slowly put my hand down his pants and say: "My, aren't you cold in there, could use some heating up... works every time!" "You know what, maybe I'll try that." laughs Margie. They meet up again a few days later and Margie is in a terrible mood. "You almost got me divorced!" she says to Sharon. "WHAT? HOW??" Sharon is astounded. "Well, I did what you said, and I stuck my hand down his pants, but it wasn't cold it was already hot!" "So?" asks Sharon, confused. "Well then I asked my husband why the inside of his pants is hot and not cold like Sharon's husband."
I ate a spoon of food color...
Now i'm dying inside.
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