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Hot

How do you measure the heaviness of a red hot chili pepper?
Give it a weigh, give it a weigh, give it a weigh now.
Why was the man using ketchup during the rain?
Someone said it was raining cats and hot dogs.
Your name must be Summer because you are hot.
“A woman is like a tea bag – you can’t tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water.”
Eleanor Roosevelt
Why did the rooster cross the road?
He heard there were some hot chicks on the other side.
What does Avogadro put in his hot chocolate?
Marsh-mole-ows
A lady sees a cowboy and says "are you really a cowboy?" The cowboy says "why yes mame, born and raised right here in Montana and have worked on the ranch since I was knee high to a pup."

The woman says " I've always wondered why cowboys always wear those big hats." The wide brim keeps the sun off'aya when it's hot and the rain off'aya when it rain'n."

"Why do you all wear vests?" Well mame, it keeps ya warm when it's cold but it leaves your arms free for rope'n and work'n."

"What about the chaps? " "They keep the burrs and brambles off'a ya."

She says "that all makes perfect sense, but what I don't understand is why you'd wear tennis shoes."

"Aww, that's easy, that's so folks don't mistake us for TRUCKERS!"
Why did the pre-pubescent dragon lose the rap battle?
He couldn't spit hot fire yet.
Two Dragons walk into a bar.
1st dragon: It's hot in here
2nd dragon: Shut your mouth.
"Just one hot chick."
Why did the pre-pubescent dragon lose the rap battle?
He couldn't spit hot fire yet.
Two Dragons walk into a bar.
1st dragon: It's hot in here
2nd dragon: Shut your mouth.
Tropic like it's hot.
Why’s it always hot after a football game?
All the fans left.
Here’s the game plan: [party details]
With salsa, cheese dip, and guac, our bowl game is hot.