Hockey Jokes

Do you know what they say about hockey players? They can always find the opening!
Date a hockey player, we always wear protection.
I’m a hockey player; of course my stick is curved!
Football players get cheerleaders, but hockey players bring them home.
Do you play hockey? 'Cause I wouldn't mind poke-checking you.
What penalty in hockey uses the most amount of energy? A power play.”
What penalty in hockey uses the most amount of energy?
A power play.
A Sporting Spirit At one point during a game, the coach called one of his 7-year-old hockey players aside and asked, "Do you understand what cooperation is? What a team is?" The little boy nodded in the affirmative. "Do you understand that what matters is not whether we win or lose, but how we play together as a team?" The little boy nodded yes. "So," the coach continued, "I'm sure you know, when a penalty is called, you shouldn't argue, curse, attack the referee, or call him a pecker-head." Do you understand all that?" Again the little boy nodded. He continued, "And when I call you off the ice so that another boy gets a chance to play, it's not good sportsmanship to call your coach 'a dumb a--hole', is it?" Again the little boy nodded. "Good," said the coach. "Now go over there and explain all that to your mother."
Did Cyclops the X-man play hockey? Yes, he enjoyed lasing up the skates.
What's the sweetest moment in a hockey game? When they're icing the puck.
Will the Red Wings be able to replace their venerable captain Steve? No, because
when it comes to hockey smarts there is no Yzer man.
What was the skeleton doing at the hockey game?
Driving the zam-boney.
What happened to the blonde Ice Hockey Team? They drowned in Spring Training
Ice hockey is basically just guys wearing knife shoes fighting each other with long sticks for the last Oreo.
I'm waking up at 5am for hockey. But I would stay up all night for you.
Are you into hockey? That's great because I'd like to score.
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