Josh was excited. As his first official duty as a parish priest, fresh out of school, he got to officiate his first funeral for a homeless man with no friends or family. The young priest vowed to give him the most loving send-off, the love he probably missed in this life. The funeral was to be held at a new cemetery across town and this man was the first to be laid to rest there. New to the area, Father Josh arrived late, but noticed a few workers gathering around the grave opening. The young and enthusiastic priest poured out his heart and soul as he gave his sermon and recited the prayers. His voice was so evocative and powerful that he brought the cemetery workers to tears. When the service was over, the priest thanked the workers for listening and walked to his car. As he opened the door, Josh heard one worker say to the other, “I've never seen anything like that before and I've been putting in septic systems for over 20 years!"

His wife having passed away an Englishman went to the local monumental mason in order to acquire a suitable headstone in time for the funeral. The mason asked for suggestions regarding a suitable inscription. The customer considered the problem and decided that, as his late wife had been quite religious, name, dates etc. and “She was thine” would be suitable. He agreed to return in two days and paid extra for the master’s rapid service. When he came back he was shown the stone by the apprentice mason and examined it. He demanded to see the master and complained that the stone had obviously been prepared by the apprentice. “How can you tell” he was asked. “ Look at it man, it says” “She was THIN” “THIN!” “He’s only gone and forgotten the e”! The mason apologized profusely and said it can be fixed by that very afternoon if the customer would return then. Well, when he returned to look at the work he went into an absolute rage and shouted at the master that he must have given this important task to the apprentice again. “How can you tell” asked the master. “Well”, raved the customer, “now it says” “Eeee, she was thin”.