Whilst holidaying in France I saw a group of mushrooms performing Queen covers.
I said 'You're brilliant, what's the band called?'
They replied 'We are the Champignons."
Why do they eat snail in France?
Because they don’t have fast food.
What does the Tour de France and Amsterdam have in common?
They both have a bunch of people on drugs riding around on bikes.
So you live in the seventh most populous city in France?
Must be Nice.
French guy goes into a bar with a frog on his head
The bartender asks “where’d you get that?” And the frog says “in France. There’s loads of them.”
What do France and a pigeon have in common?
Every 5 minutes, there is a coo.
So I went to France and bought a house made of bread
I guess you could say I'm living in pain.
Paratroopers from England, Scotland, France and the US were on a plane.
During World War II, four paratroopers each from England, Scotland, France and the US, were on a plane about to jump when they realized there was only one serviceable parachute.
The French paratrooper downed a glass of cognac, said "Pour la France!" and jumped without the parachute.
The American downed a glass of bourbon, said "For freedom!" and jumped without the parachute.
The Scotsman downed a glass of whiskey, said "For Scotland!" and threw the Englishman.
The owner and head of sales of a large furniture store in the mid-west arrived in Paris on a buying trip. As he was checking into a hotel he struck up an acquaintance with a beautiful young lady. However, she only spoke French and he only spoke English, so each couldn't understand a word the other spoke.
He took out a pencil and a notebook and drew a picture of a taxi. She smiled, nodded her head and they went for a ride in the park.
Later, he drew a picture of a table in a restaurant with a question mark and she nodded, so they went to dinner.
After dinner, he sketched two dancers and she was delighted. They went to several night-clubs, drank champagne, danced and had a glorious evening.
It had gotten quite late when she motioned for the pencil and drew a picture of a four-poster bed. He was utterly amazed and took her home.
To this very day, he still doesn't know how she guessed that he was a furniture salesman!
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