Electric Jokes

Take it Back! A man walks into Home Depot and tells one of the employees that he wants to buy an electric saw to cut down trees. The employee says "I got just what you need! Look at this beauty, it can cut down 100 trees a day!" The guy likes it, buys it and goes home. The next week the same guy comes back to Home Depot with an angry face and tells the employee "This electric saw is terrible! I could only cut down 50 trees a day!" The employee answers "I'm sorry to hear that, sir. Look, we got an even better option, this new electric saw that can cut 200 trees a day!" The man's face lights up, he returns the old electric saw and buys the new one. One week after he comes back with an even angrier face and demands the employee: "You told me I could cut down 200 trees with this saw, but I can only cut down 100! I want my money back!" The employee apologizes, "I am truly sorry to hear that. Look, we just got this brand new, state-of-the-art electric saw that can cut 400 trees a day!" Again, the guy returns the old saw and happily buys the new one. One week passes and the guy storms into Home Depot. He yells "I am fed up! No matter what I did, I could only cut down 200 trees a day!" The employee says, "OK sir, let me have a look at the saw." The employee takes the saw, and cranks it up. The sound of the motor can be heard throughout the whole store. The guy looks at the employee with disbelief and asks, "What the hell is that sound?!?"
I used to have an electric wok but I had to get rid of it
Wouldn’t run.
What did the light bulb say to the electric generator? ‘You spark up my life!”
What is the energy provider’s favorite dance? The electric slide.”
What would a barefoot man get if he stepped on an electric fence? A pair of shocks.”
Electric razors are the best thing since sliced beard.
What instrument never fails to energize a crowd?
An electric guitar.
What is an energy provider’s favorite dance?
The electric slide.
I used to hate the electric blanket.
But the last few nights I’ve been warming up to it.
Ringo, John snd George walked into an electric guitar shop...
They were less Paul.
Saw a sign for bath plugs. I didn’t know that was electric!
"Hey dad, my electric toothbrush is broken!"
"No son, it's just gone acoustic."
New electric trains will run on conductors.
“I love money. I love everything about it. I bought some pretty good stuff. Got me a $300 pair of socks. Got a fur sink. An electric dog polisher. A gasoline powered turtleneck sweater. And, of course, I bought some dumb stuff, too.” – Steve Martin
What powers an electric kettle?
Electrici-tea.
"A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday."
— Erma Bombeck
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