Eight Jokes

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Two 4's.
Two 4's who?
No need to make lunch we already 8.
“From the ages of eight to 18, me and my family moved around a lot. Mostly we would just stretch, but occasionally one of us would actually get up to go to the fridge.”
Jarod Kintz
What's the difference between Hanukkah and dragons?
One is eight nights while the other ate knights
What has eight arms and an IQ of 60? Four guys watching a football game.
What has eight arms and an IQ of 60?
Four guys drinking Bud Light and watching a football game!
Teacher: "If I had seven oranges in one hand and eight oranges in the other, what would I have?"

Little Johnny: "Big hands!"
"When the waitress asked if I wanted my pizza cut into four or eight slices, I said, 'Four. I don't think I can eat eight."
— Yogi Berra
“By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day.” — Robert Frost
“It’s a shame that the only thing a man can do for eight hours a day is work. He can’t eat for eight hours; he can’t drink for eight hours; he can’t make love for eight hours. The only thing a man can do for eight hours is work.” — William Faulkner
What's the difference between Hanukkah and dragons?
One is eight nights while the other ate knights.
“Cats are smarter than dogs. You can’t get eight cats to pull a sled through snow.” —Jeff Valdez
The computer said my password needed at least eight characters and at least one number, so I changed it to Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.
To Be Eight Again A husband was sitting on the edge of the bed, watching his wife, who was looking at herself in the mirror. Since her birthday was not far off, he asked what she’d like as a gift. “I’d like to be 8 again,” she replied, still looking in the mirror. On the morning of her birthday, he rose early, made her a nice big bowl of Coco Pops, and then took her to Adventure World theme park. What a day! He put her on every ride in the park; the Death Slide, the Wall of Fear, the Screaming Roller Coaster, everything there was. Five hours later they staggered out of the theme park. Her head was reeling and her stomach felt upside down. He then took her to a McDonald’s where he ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries and a chocolate shake. Then it was off to a movie, with popcorn, a soda pop, and her favorite candy, M&Ms. What a fabulous adventure! Finally she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed, exhausted. He leaned over his wife with a big smile and lovingly asked, "Well dear, what was it like being 8 again?" Her eyes slowly opened and her expression suddenly changed. "I meant my dress size, you idiot!"
What’s black and white, has eight wheels and travels very fast?
A panda on roller skates.
What's the difference between Hanukkah and dragons?
One is eight nights while the other ate knights.
Did you hear about the ghoul who had eight arms?
He was very handy!
Want to start your day laughing? Register to our Daily Joke!
Did you mean:
Continue With: Facebook Google
By continuing, you agree to our T&C and Privacy Policy