Banana

Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.
Why was the pear by himself? Because the banana split.
Why did the banana tree have to make a doctor’s appointment during the hurricane? Her fruit was peeling under the weather.
What did the pastry chef say when a banana cream pie he made completely satisfies a tyrannical ruler?
It hit despot.
Why did the banana go out with a lemon?
Because it couldn't find a date!
If a crocodile makes shoes, what can you make out of a banana?
Slippers!
I was walking down the street when I stood on a banana.
Luckily, I was wearing my Slipknot t-shirt.
My boss accused me of "acting the monkey" at work.
I almost choked on my banana.
Did you hear about the banana who went to the doctor's because he wasn't peeling very well?
What should you do if you see a blue banana?
Try and cheer it up.
Why did the banana go out with a prune?
Because he couldn't find a date.
What do you call two banana skins?
A pair of slippers.
Why did the banana go to the doctor?
It wasn’t PEELING well.
A man goes to the Doctor with a banana in one ear, a carrot in the other ear and a cucumber up his nose. “What’s wrong with me doc?” He asks.
“It’s easy, you're not eating properly.” the doctors replies.
What type of fruit includes Barium and double Sodium? BaNaNa.